Our Growing Family Tree

New times, new blog

2008-09-20T02:02:00.003-05:00

Our growing family has outgrown this blog. To see our new password-protected photo-journal (updated weekly) go to www.beattiemoss.shutterfly.com and sign up as a member.

The password is the name of the city my parents were born in. If that doesn't help you,
just drop me an email at melissabmoss@gmail.com

Thanks!
M.

Summer Evening in the Park

2008-06-11T00:16:00.002-05:00

Stress levels are still generally riding high around here, mostly due to work deadlines and Sophie (still!) not sleeping through the night. "Fatigue" just doesn't cover how deeply exhausted we are...Yowza! But even though we're working quite hard these days (did I mention we're building a house? did I mention that involves thousands of teensy-weensy yet critically important decisions? did I mention how tired we are?) our spirits are fortified by lovely moments such as depicted here. Enjoy!

Meeee-OW!

2008-05-12T15:34:00.003-05:00

No, we haven't gotten a cat. The above photo is meant to illustrate our current situation: We unpacked our boxes in our apartment and tried to settle in, only to discover that the wall-to-wall carpet has a pervasive, stomach-turning cat piss odor. The previous tenants (or generations of tenants...there's huge turn-over in these apartment units) had a cat or multiple cats who seemingly enjoyed peeing on the carpet in the dining room. It's gross enough that there's wall-to-wall carpet in a dining room. When Sophie dropped a chunk of banana onto the floor and I bent down to pick it up, that's when the unmistakable CAT PEE! message really reached my brain. Since then we've had a long stretch of rainy weather which has made the cat pee so unbearable that we've actually moved out temporarily. Luckily for us, my parents' trip to Germany for two weeks coincided with this stinky crisis. So we packed Guthrie off to "doggie summer camp" --AKA the luxury kennel he loves to go to--and we hightailed it over to the Mom and Dad's swanky digs on the other side of town, where we enjoy the clean hardwood floors, hotter showers, and a beautiful view from the living room of the empty lot next door where our house will be built. Our "moving in day" in November can't come soon enough. I loved my cat and still miss her...but Lordy the smell. There is hope though. The apartment management recognizes the problem and is replacing the carpet this week while we're away, and then we plan to buy and run ionizing air purifiers for good measure. Cat odors are the main issue, but we also are adjacent to a parking lot, there's tons of pollen about, plus the place also kinda reeks of air fresheners used over the years, no doubt in attempts to mask the toxic fumes arising from the cat litter box they kept in the dining room...Gaaaaaah!

Okay, enough of that. How's the family, you ask? We're all fine. The Cliffnotes on the kiddos:

Sophie: 17 months old, our spirited girl, climbing EVERYTHING, throws a ball like a 5 year old, would live on tomatoes, strawberries and water in her ideal world; distributes kisses every evening, not speaking much yet or rather speaks her own distinct argot: "Isitabus?" and "Isitgold?" are frequent questions: You'd be amazed to know that "Is it a bus?" and "Is it gold?" are often quite appropriate things to ask. She also has a wide vocabulary of distinct dog barks. We're so proud.

Noah: AKA Spiderman---He has discovered a passion for indoor rock climbing walls and man, is he GOOD at it! Strong, fearless, smart...Up he goes, right to the top. His other super powers: Reads whole books in a single bound; Surfs the--what else?--Web with alacrity. We're counting down until camp in late June, two whole weeks away from home. It'll be great for him and of course we'll be counting the days until his return!

Anne and I had a good Mother's Day, mostly focused on making it a nice day for Pauli. Anne brought her to my parents' house for a lunch I purchased at Wegmans and then arranged artistically on plates at home. Good not to have to cook since we'd gotten back from Philly at 1 a.m. the night before. It all worked out fine. Pauli is using a walker now and tires very easily, but had a nice afternoon with us.

I promise photos in the next post. Plus more info about our new house-to-be...We're getting pretty excited about the whole thing and feel, more than ever, that this is the RIGHT decision.

The end of an era

2008-04-22T22:13:00.002-05:00

Everyone is sleeping and I should be too...but I may pack a few more boxes before flopping into bed. Tonight is the last night in this house...this house that has been home for five years. So much has happened in our lives while we've lived here...Noah went from kindergarten to 5th grade; Pauli had five good years spending time with us and enjoying living with Anne; I got a second Master's degree and found a good job here; Anne and I decided to have another child---and welcomed beautiful Sophie. We've gotten through some sad times and some tough challenges--both my grandmothers' deaths; Pauli's strokes and move into assisted living; my mother' s heart surgery--as well as all of life's normal ups and downs. we've celebrated so many things--friendships, parties (big, blow-out July 4th parties!), Pauli's 90th birthday, Sophie's 1st birthday, achievements large and small, Shabbat dinners and Sunday brunches...Quiet times sitting on the deck swing together, eating fudgesicles and watching the sunset, and amazing times like the double rainbow that arched over our house...or the time the hot air balloon almost emergency-landed in our back yard! Memories of Noah and Guthrie--little boy and puppy--playing together with the hose in the kiddie pool...Memories of some hard times, trying to juggle all our care-taking roles...Wondering when the time would come when we would have less responsibility (elder care is hard!) and feeling at times like this big house was just another demand on our time and energy...but despite the tough moments, feeling grateful for the space and light and security this house has given us...

And now it's time to move on. Tomorrow bright and early, the movers will arrive to carry our furniture and boxes out the door...

A new era is about to begin for our family, one we're very ready for. One with an emphasis on "just enough and not too much" and peace, organization, fulfillment...

May it all come to be...after one more night's rest under this roof!

An insanely busy time

2008-03-30T20:13:00.004-05:00

This will be a short post, just to share that we are unbelievably busy at the moment. Even I, who generally likes to be busy, am finding this a lot to handle. Between getting ready for our move (in three weeks!) and working full time, plus making endless decisions about the new house we're having built and getting all that paperwork signed so the construction can begin, plus getting Noah to his various activities, and the exhausting nights with Sophie, and with my fibromyalgia symptoms in a painful flare-up...no wonder I'm stretched to the limit here. I haven't even mentioned that Anne broke her foot again and is in pain...or that she's juggling all this plus daily visits to her mother (Pauli is now back in assisted living).

BIG SIGH.

It will all work out. Moving is just so stressful. I wish I could take off work for a month to deal with all this, but since that's not possible I'll have to find a way to do all of this.

There's a lot of good stuff going on...In fact, it's mostly good (except for the health struggles...working on improving that.) Trying to keep my focus on the positives: We sold the house, we figured out where we want to move, we are really looking forward to our new chapter in the new house, we're both gainfully employed, the children are wonderful, it's great having my folks nearby, we have terrific childcare help in Evelina and we've found an excellent new (live-out) nanny for when she leaves, it's starting to feel like spring.

Well, this wasn't SUCH a short post after all. It's 10 minutes before 10 and Anne just came downstairs with Sophie who resisted an hour-long attempt to put to bed. Dear God, why oh why couldn't we have gotten ONE child who goes to sleep easily and sleeps through the night? (None of the three kids were good sleepers as babies, Arthur included.) They're such great kids...and Sophie---the worst sleeper of all three---has a delightful personality: cheerful, affectionate, curious, a great sense of humor. But not a sleeper. I guess we can't ask for everything.

Anne put her into the playpen for a little while (she's in there now "reading" books) and I'll try again with the night-night routine in a second.

Time to sign off and get busy, busy, busy again.

The many moods of Sophie Isabelle

2008-03-21T20:17:00.003-05:00

To make up for not posting for so long, here's a bonanza of photos of Sophie taken one evening about three weeks ago. Our little baby girl is getting big so fast...and she's keeping us laughing with her many expressions and "busy busy busy" activities around the house.

Hanging out with the family. Check out big brother Noah on the computer in the background!

Breaking free, ready to run!

Siblings and good friends

Sophie's furry big brother, outside on the deck

A pensive moment

Pretending to be a crawling baby is so much fun!

Who are you lookin' at?

What the heck does this expression convey?

As I was saying...

Let's see...what's that number for late-night milk delivery?

Message machine? Drats!

A big lapse in blogging...and big news!

2008-03-21T00:04:00.002-05:00

Hello there to anyone who tunes in to our blog from time to time. It's been way too long since my last family update. We've been in major "coping/functioning/no time to think" mode with so much going on in our lives at the moment. The very good news: We've sold our house! The closing is set for the end of April and we're delighted to be moving forward. Speaking of moving, what do you do when you sell your house but have nowhere to move? The answer used to be "crash with Mom and Dad" but that's no longer so easy when we're a family of five (with Evelina) plus the dog. House-hunting was a discouraging experience. We saw a bunch of houses, but not a single one seemed right. A brief summary: There was the Mold on Basement Wall house; the Steep Driveway/Psychotic Neighbor house; the Amazing Curb Appeal but Smells Bad Inside house; there was the Mismatched Linoleum/Tile/Carpeting house; the Pepto Bismol Pink Bathroom house; the Greco-Roman Wall Coverings and Mural house; etc.

After seeing all these places, we finally realized that our best option, for many reasons, would be to build in the condominium community my parents recently moved into. We're feeling very "been there, done that, don't need to do it again" about yard work, shoveling snow, deck staining, mowing...all that home maintenance stuff that is expensive and eats up your free time. We've never been into grilling outdoors and we'd be satisfied with creating small-scale gardens around our house and in containers on our porch and deck. So........another big announcement....we have put money down on the lot next to my parents and are getting the contracts signed soon...Yeeeee-ha! My folks are delighted and we are too. We'll enjoy those walking and biking trails a lot, and it'll be great to walk Noah to school every day. And as my dad put it recently "It's amazing...I don't even own a snow shovel any more" --- Sounds good to me!

Signing off for now. Photos of the kids will be posted tomorrow!

Getting through the winter

2008-02-16T07:59:00.003-05:00

It's been a month since I've updated the blog, perhaps a record lapse.

It's been a challenging month.

On our minds:

Anne's mom: Pauli ("Nana" to the kids) fell last week and fractured her pelvis in two places.
We spent 5 hours in the emergency room with her and then she was transfered to a nursing home (adjacent to her assisted living residence) for at least 6 weeks of rehab. Poor Nana! It's not easy to cope with injuries at 91, but she's got a strong constitution and we're hoping she'll be able to go back to her assisted living room when rehab is over. Needless to say, we're thinking about her (and visiting her) a lot, and hoping for the best.

Fibromyalgia: My struggle with fibro has intensified lately. Major muscle pain (especially neck and ribs) and headaches and mental fuzziness and fatigue. No fun at all. I'm back to raw food eating and juicing and taking supplements (malic acid, enzymes, etc.) and trying to keep my spirits up.

Sleep: Sophie's sleeping pattern hasn't improved...She wakes every couple hours. We are getting VERY exhausted by this demanding night-time parenting. On two separate occasions, for no apparent reason, she slept through the night---and then immediately reverted to the frequent waking pattern again. I don't know what to say about this...We've read the books and we've tried lots of approaches...but we'll have to keep looking for some solution, because we all need our sleep!

Real estate: We have some nibbles on our house---and we continue to house-hunt as well. Email me for more details if you'd like.

Work: I don't believe in blogging about my work life...Suffice to say, I've taken on some interesting new projects and I'm trying hard to do a good job at them, regardless of life being rather demanding lately.

That's the mid-February update. More cheerful and photo-filled posts to come soon...Counting my blessings...Ready for spring! Ready for change!!!

Sleep update

2008-01-17T19:05:00.000-05:00

Who knows what's going on? Not us. We're clueless. Either she's slowly--and erratically--catching on to our sleep training routine...or we're just desperate to think that she is. Which is it, I wonder.

Since the "miracle night" when she didn't wake once, she has had the full range of success levels at this sleep training thing: a couple "ready to party at 4 a.m." nights, a "waking briefly only once" night, a "worst ever" night (last night) and who knows what's in store for us tonight.

The "worst ever" episode last night = woke crying at 1:30, I spent over 2 hours trying to get her back to sleep, no luck, crying baby, exhausted me...Finally woke Anne so she could take over (and I could get enough sleep to function at work today) and--when I came upstairs at 7 to check on them--Anne and Sophie were both asleep on the rug, with a blanket over them!

Sophie was so tired this evening, she barely could stay awake through dinner and her bath.
I let her toddle around her room playing with her toys after her bath, as usual, but she was so exhausted that she actually brought me Good Night Moon and tried to climb up onto my lap:
We always read Good Night Room right before lights out...so she was basically telling me "Let's move this routine along Mommy!" Very cute. She went to sleep at 7 pm after a few minutes of lackluster fussing...

Anne and Noah are out at youth orchestra so I think I'll watch Colbert Report and eat some popcorn. Yes, I live a wild, reckless life. Right on the edge, that's me.

Happy Birthday Noah!!!

2008-01-15T21:46:00.000-05:00

Today is Noah's 11th birthday! Those who know him all agree: He is one fantastic, smart, sweet, funny, adorable, handsome, lovable...what am I leaving out?...talented, musical, charming, sensible, caring, helpful, amazing young man. I was going to say "boy" but eleven really is the beginning of pre-teen, isn't it? How can it be? Time is really a mind-bender...Eleven years tonight I held him in my arms and stared down at his little face and thought "This is my son!" And every possible wish and dream I had about being a mom and sharing life with him has come true...and more wonderfully than I could have imagined. For instance, I knew that Noah would be a very good big brother. But even I didn't know how absolutely phenomenal he is with Sophie. They are truly a mutual adoration society, the two of them. And he is so gentle and patient with her...the perfect big brother.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST NOAH! WE LOVE YOU!

Great news, but....Shhh...Don't jinx it...

2008-01-13T18:05:00.000-05:00

I'm here to report AMAZING news: Sophie slept through the night last night!

Let it be recorded for posterity that on the night of Saturday, January 12th, 2008, Sophie slept more than 4 hours in a row for the very first time since birth. I put her to sleep at 8:30 p.m. and she woke up at 7:30 a.m.!!!

Some readers (family) will recall that Noah was a very light and...er...extremely resistant sleeper and Anne & I basically didn't get a full night's sleep until he was three years old. No wonder we waited 10 more years to have another...We had to catch up on missed sleep in preparation for Round Two with another "sleepless wonder" as we called him.

I got my first uninterrupted night's sleep last night since September 2006...(yes, two months before Sophie's birth...because when you are as hugely pregnant as I was from 7 months on, you're not sleeping too well, believe me!)

It WOULD have been wonderful to get some good rest, but ironically I had a fitful sleep with nightmares all night...about...what else? Kidnapped babies, missing babies, even a plot to murder a baby (Anne and I intervened heroically). I think my psyche clearly was VERY uncomfortable with the missing baby in my life, the one usually in my bed from 1 a.m. on. I woke up very confused at 6 a.m. and immediately checked the bed in a panic for Sophie. Ah, there's nothing like that terrifying "Where's my baby?!" adrenaline rush to start one's day. I then went upstairs to wake Anne (who had slept in the guest room so she could get a good night's sleep) and insisted that she come with me into Sophie's room to check on her...I was really nervous. I thought something terrible must be wrong for me not to have heard from the baby all night long. Yes, melodrama is not foreign to me. Needless to say, the baby was sleeping like a baby, for the first time ever. Sound asleep at 6 a.m. Anne and I were able to go back to sleep together for another hour and a half, completely and utterly amazed.

What made this miracle happen?

I don't want to jinx it--after all, it was just ONE night and all nights before it were very difficult--but we are several days into a new routine, courtesy of the advice of sleep expert Dana Obleman http://www.childsleepcenter.com/ whose report I purchased a couple weeks ago. Though I felt a bit like a chump for buying it, the advice was good...stuff you could call common sense, but having it all laid out for me clearly was very helpful and...

2 HR. LAPSE SINCE THE ABOVE POST...

Well...I took a break from typing to put Sophie to bed. Whereas last night, she cried for 7 minutes after being put in her crib and then fell asleep, tonight she screamed for almost 60 minutes (the first 40 with me and then Anne took over for the second shift) before conking out. The word "screamed" falls short of describing what my girl can do. These are loud, glass-cracking, piercing high notes. These are shrieks of agony that sound like she's being tortured with a red-hot poker. All while Anne or I sit right next to the crib, patting her back gently, humming a lullaby...This is after warm milk, a soothing bath, Goodnight Moon, "white noise" machine...I'd LOVE to be put to bed like that. Right now. Please, somebody. I guess it's just my fate that my kids, when little, flat-out detest going to sleep.

I was so wiped out afterwards, I just sat on the couch eating Raisin Bran and watching Martha Stewart. Yes, my dirty little secret is out. I don't DO a damn thing Martha Stewarty but watching her on t.v. is like Valium for me. Watching Martha Stewart organize a linen closet is some kind of baby-shredded-my-last-nerve antidote.
Then Anne came downstairs and we watched an episode of The L Word and got a chuckle or two out of that.

Off to bed now with the baby monitor hissing on the night table...Will I see Miss S. at 1 p.m. (in an hour and fifteen minutes) or at 7 a.m.? Tune in next time...

First illness

2007-12-23T22:57:00.000-05:00

Our darling girl is on the mend from her first bout of illness and thankfully will be just fine.

We've just come through several days of Sophie running high fevers, doctor appointments, and finally a trip to the emergency room Saturday morning.

What started with a slight fever (100) on Wednesday evening turned into two days of spiking temperatures (up to 105.6 at its highest Thursday afternoon, prompting an immediate trip to the doctor)and two sleepless nights for all of us. Poor Sophie was HOT, listless, miserable, wouldn't eat or drink (we were feeding her Pedialite with an eye dropper at the worst point) and had three vomiting episodes.

Thursday's doctor visit seemed to rule out ear infection (he removed wax and pronounced her ears fine) and urinary tract infection (he catheterized her--while I held her down, awful, awful--and her urine test was normal), so the doctor's assumption was that she had some kind of run-of-the-mill rhinovirus, aka a cold. Nothing to be done except keep her comfortable and let it run its course.

Except that she didn't have any cold symptoms...no runny nose, no stuffiness, just a blazing hot fever, despite our alternating doses of baby Tylenol and Motrin every three hours (it would knock it back a degree or two, but she was still above 102, crying, exhausted and miserable). We gave her tepid baths, put cold compresses on her, and just waited for the fever to break. Noah never had such high fevers so this was a new and quite scary thing for us.

By Saturday morning, she was 104 after her cool bath and seemed dehydrated (crying w/out tears, for instance). I just felt the diagnosis of rhinovirus was not correct...She should have been on the mend by then. The pediatrician on call agreed that we should go in to the E.R. She said we should be prepared that they'd want to run blood tests, do a chest x-ray to check for pneumonia, re-catheterize to check urine again, and probably insert an IV to get fluids into her. We absolutely dreaded putting her through all that, but we had to take her in. She was so listless from the fever when I carried her into the E.R. Awful to see her that way.

Luckily, we were spared that whole scenario of interventions. The ER doc took one look at Sophie's ears and said "Wow! Bad ear infection going on in there" (Anne looked too and later told me it was "blood red"...yikes). I guess the doctor who examined her at 4pm on Thursday didn't see any sign of it brewing, since he said her ears were fine. Sophie is now on a 5 day course of antibiotics and is doing better already. Last night she slept peacefully next to me, cool as can be...I just kept feeling her forehead all night to check and feeling so grateful that my baby was on the mend.

Just think: One of my grandmother's brothers died in childhood from a tooth infection. As primitive as our medical knowledge will look to future generations, I'm so thankful we have antibiotics when needed, live in a place with skilled doctors available, and have health insurance. The alternative isn't pretty.

Sophie goes to class!

2007-12-23T22:26:00.000-05:00

Whenever music is playing, Sophie starts bopping to the beat, clapping her hands, and moving her feet...so we thought she'd love taking a weekly music class. And we were right...She loves it! Here are some photos from the start of class: The instruments are spread out on the rug and the toddlers are let loose to play. Let the wild rumpus start!

Sophie likes that cymbal

She examines it closely

Wait a minute...This pink tambourine is mighty cute too!

And that girl's green teddy bear would be a perfect match with my green teddy bear, but I'd have to drop my pink maraca to take it...What to do, what to do....

I know! I'll just get into the bin with ALL the instruments so I don't have to choose!

I'm on top of the situation now

Music class is tiring! I think I'll hang onto Grandma for awhile.

Grandma wants me to wear a tambourine hat when it doesn't even match my outfit! Glad I have my buddy Eliana here for support.

Noah's holiday recital, 2007

2007-12-21T14:20:00.000-05:00

Every year, Noah's music school plays a holiday recital to collect donations for the local food bank. Last year's concert in early December was Sophie's first time out in public after being born. That was a fun evening for us, as we got to show our new baby to the community and enjoy Noah's musical accomplishments. Well, this year was even more fun because Sophie was able to enjoy the music along with us--and beam with pride at big brother Noah, her hero. The other families were all amazed at how Sophie has grown in one year...She was toddling around, smiling, clapping--a big girl and a real music lover, just like the rest of us.

A few images from the evening...Enjoy!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Saint Lucia Day 2007

2007-12-16T12:29:00.000-05:00

As some of you know, Sweden holds a special place in our hearts. While many of our Hungarian family members perished in the Holocaust, those who survived were rescued by Swedish humanitarian organizations and were given safe haven in Sweden after the war. Some of them made lives there, married, had children and grandchildren...which is how we come to have many relatives in Sweden who we've not yet met. Having a Swedish au pair live with us this year has given us another connection to the country...and we look forward to visiting before too long (perhaps next year). In honor of Sweden's place in our lives--and to bring a little Swedish holiday cheer into the house--we held our first Saint Lucia party. Scandinavians celebrate "Sankta Lucia" on December 13th with songs, pastry and lights...most notably the Lucia crown girls wear. We opted for the battery lit version rather than risk setting our hair on fire! Evelina demonstrated how to make her mother's recipe for Saffron cake, as well as gingerbread cookies. Both were truly delicious! I set our a smorgasbord, made a big pot of glogg (spiced wine) and then friends came over (braving a dark, icy evening) and we had a wonderful time eating, drinking and making merry. Here are some photos from our little celebration. Pictured are Jacquie, John and Sarah; Tony, Deb, Pilar (Daniel and Noah were having fun downstairs); Evelina the Pastry Chef, and of course Grandma and Grandpa, Anne and Sophie.
Happy Saint Lucia Day!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

November birthdays

2007-12-05T00:45:00.000-05:00

I know we're already into December, but I can't leave November behind without a post to commemorate what is The Birthday Month in our extended family. It's extraordinary how many folks in our circle have November birthdays, including Sophie of course. Something about March is good for baby-making it seems!

I feel like I've been a bit delinquent in my attentiveness to birthdays (other than Sophie's of course!) and other matters of socializing, etiquette, etc. simply due to being too busy and too tired most days.

So before November is too long gone, here's a big birthday hug and wishes for a healthy and happy year, sent out to:

My mother-in-law Pauli

My sister-in-law Pauline

My brother-in-law Scott

My nephew-in-law (for want of a better term) Steve

and my friend M.B. the Knitter too...thinking of you often and will call soon.

The second-runner-up for most popular birthday month in our family is April, so I have some time to get my act together and send proper gifts and greetings to those folks!

House search update

2007-12-05T00:44:00.001-05:00

Pin Oak
Originally uploaded by ian.crowther

I thought it was high time for a real estate update. Our house is still on the market, and while we're waiting for a buyer, we've been fixing it up quite a lot. It looks so fabulous now, we're tempted to stay (just kidding...we want to move on, but it really is pretty.) We may have a repeat showing soon...fingers crossed.

Meanwhile, on the house-hunting front, I should inform you that almost immediately after I posted that starry-eyed post about the "Mountain View House" complete with tons of photos uploaded to flickr (!) we discovered a moldy wall in the basement...DEAL BREAKER! I'm highly allergic to mold and know from experience that it's almost impossible to get rid of. The basement has poor ventilation, isn't a walk-out and only has one window...so we've crossed poor old Mountain View House off our list for good.

Since then, we discovered another house we shall call the Pin Oak House (hence this post's image) because of the large pin oak that stands on the front lawn. We've been back three times and eventually did end up making a contingency offer...which they rejected because they don't want to get tied up in a holding pattern waiting for us to sell, and I can't blame them. But we've been keeping our eye on Pin Oak House and, so far, it's still on the market. So maybe, just maybe, the timing will work out and we'll get it yet.

The pros:
Its location is both convenient to town and also private, on a cul de sac lane. A great combo.

We have friends who live across the street.

A good price for a well-built home.

The cons:
A steep driveway

A sloped backyard...not much yard to run around on but plenty of trees for a treehouse, key item on Noah's wish list! And room for a large deck with a hot tub, key item on Mommy's wish list.

I'll keep you posted.

Happy Hanukkah!

2007-12-05T00:30:00.001-05:00

One For Each Night
Originally uploaded by skasper

To everyone celebrating, Happy Hanukkah! Tonight is the first night and we kicked off the holiday with a wonderful meal at my parents' house. Mom made a heaping platter of amazing latkes, served with chunky applesauce and light sour cream, along with a braised red cabbage dish. Yummy! We had coconut macaroons for dessert. Of course, we needed our chocolate fix so we melted some dark chocolate and dipped the macaroons in it like a fondue. Fun! We ended the meal with a pot of berry tea. So begins Hanukkah 2008. I didn't take any photos tonight unfortunately (picture Sophie with a mouthful of her first latke and picture Noah's elation at his gift, a 2 gb USB drive he's been begging us for (yep, he's a computer fanatic at age ten)...So in lieu of a photo of my own, I borrowed a public one from flickr to accompany this post. Noah actually has this menorah and has lit it every year since he was tiny...but we packed it up when we were doing prep work for our impending move (fingers crossed). Wishing you all a season of light...and health and happiness for the new year ahead.

Too pooped to party!

2007-12-05T00:02:00.000-05:00

After a very exciting birthday party last Saturday, Grandma put our darling one-year-old put into her high chair for some lunch. After a few bites, when Grandma's back was turned for a moment, Sophie fell fast asleep right there on her tray.
My mom came tip-toeing into the other room to get us and we all stood there giggling at this sight! A memory we'll treasure for years to come...so glad I got the photo!

12 month check-up and the vaccination talk

2007-11-30T02:05:00.000-05:00

Sophie had her well-baby pediatrician visit yesterday and was weighed, measured and examined. Here's the scoop! Our girl is in the 75th percentile for weight (at 22 pounds) and in the 95th percentile for height and head circumference. So she's sturdy, tall, and has plenty of room for deep thoughts in that big, beautiful head of hers! Her eyes, ears, and heart exam all were perfectly normal.

As I expected, I had another go-round with the pediatrician about the fact that we are delaying vaccinating until she is 15-24 months old. An "agree to disagree" exchange as usual. I'm not sharing our decision on this blog in order to incite any debates on this question. We've given this complex topic loads of careful thought and I'm just posting a bit about it here in case it's "food for thought" for other parents.

It's not a knee-jerk decision for us, one way or the other. We are not against vaccinations altogether, as some people are. We plan for Sophie to receive many of the recommended vaccinations. But after doing lots of reading, we do have many concerns about the current schedule. We're concerned about the wisdom of American kids routinely getting upwards of 25 different vaccines, in various combinations, in their first 15 months. And we take seriously the numerous reports of side effects following the vaccines and the possibility that neurological damage has been caused in some cases (autism, seizures, etc.)

In short, we don't want Sophie to receive so many vaccinations in her first year of life; or to receive live vaccines as combined shots, such as the MMR (measles, mumps, rubella)or DTaP (diptheria, tetanus and pertussis); or to be injected with upwards of six or seven different vaccinations at the same visit; or to be vaccinated with very new formulations that don't have any track record; or to be vaccinated against relatively harmless viruses such as chicken-pox or very rare/unlikely diseases such as HepB. And though pediatricians routinely dismiss the notion of "overloading a baby's immune system" and even dismiss the concept of immune systems altogether, we don't share our doctor's view that "there's no ceiling" on the number of vaccines that can be given at one time. He means "no published data" telling us there's no limits, referring to new vaccines that were hastily hustled through the approval process after testing done by researchers funded by the same pharmaceutical companies seeking the drug approval; drugs on which there are usually very few double-blind trials conducted and that are too new for the claim of "no long-term side effects" to have any weight.

This article by a pediatrician touting combined "super" vaccines as a fantastic approach is just the kind of approach we want to avoid: http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/immunizations/a/combo_vaccines.htm

Pediatricians routinely talk about the "convenience" of combining vaccines and eliminating the number of needle jabs a kid has to receive (and doctors have to administer, more to the point). But we feel that a momentary needle jab is NOTHING compared to the potential harm in combining different strains.

While I have great regard for medicine, medical advances, and the noble medical profession, I also know that today's certainties can become tomorrow's disproved approaches or discontinued drug. So caveat emptor.

And if anyone wants info on how to obtain Merck's single formulations for measles, mumps and rubella (instead of the MMR shot) let me know.

Happy 1st birthday to my baby!

2007-11-30T01:48:00.000-05:00

I'm a couple days late posting (life is just too busy lately) but I want to note that my baby girl turned ONE on Wednesday!

A whole year has gone by already...so quickly it's hard to believe. And it's also hard to imagine life without our precious Sophie!

November 28th, 2006 to November 28th, 2007 has been a year full of so much EVERYTHING...joy, hard work, changes, discovery, sleep deprivation, pride, contentment, upheaval, depletion, completion, nesting, loneliness (at work, away from the baby), struggle, peace...

Wow. As I said, EVERYTHING!

I'm way behind in posting photos to the blog and hope to catch up this weekend (in which case you'll see some retrospective Halloween and Thanksgiving photos here!)

But meanwhile, here's a snapshot of Sophie and her new friend Eliana on their (shared!) birthday Wednesday. Isn't that fun that she has a birthday buddy?! Eliana and her mom Stephanie are both terrific and we enjoyed sharing a fun first-birthday-playdate with them. The girls played well together -- sometimes doing their own things, sometimes playing right next to one another, negotiating about who holds a toy! Evelina made a banana birthday cake and we all sang Happy Birthday and had a little party, complete with Elmo party hats. More photos to come soon!
P.S. Sophie's polka dot dress was a gift from Evelina -- so sweet of her.

The best thing

2007-11-12T21:45:00.001-05:00

CIMG1072
Originally uploaded by Mommy Sasa

I'll leave you with another good, good thing--the best thing: another image from the summer...Noah and his gang of siblings hanging out with the grinning lobster at Ben & Bill's ice cream emporium in Bar Harbor. I love those cute faces and it lifts my spirits just looking at this photo!

Hope all is well with everyone out there. At one o'clock tomorrow, will you all please send a powerful psychic message to the couple coming to look at our place. The message to send is:

"You have an overwhelming desire to buy Anne and Melissa's house!"

A conversation taking place tomorrow at 1:15 p.m....

Wife: Honey, the oddest thing just happened...I literally heard a chorus of voices in my head urging me to buy this house...this gloriously beautiful house...

Husband: That's amazing, sweet-ums. I'm getting the same overpowering feeling...It's like I'm being urged on by an unseen force to make an offer on this house right here and now. And you know what else? To heck with bargaining! Let's pay them the full list price. In fact, they're being too modest...let's round it up!

Well, a girl can dream...

The long and winding road...

2007-11-12T21:26:00.001-05:00

CIMG1016
Originally uploaded by Mommy Sasa

Here's a pleasant image from this past summer...a long and winding road in Maine on a carefree afternoon. With my camera still out of commission (it just needs a new memory card but I've been too busy to even stop and buy one) I rummaged around in the Summer 2007 album to come up with a couple images to share. I guess I could have blogged without an image (but what is the use of a blog, thought Alice, without pictures or conversations?")

So...there's a picture and here's a bit of conversation:

Boss: "How's it coming along?"

Me: "I'm totally stressed out and don't know if I'll make the deadline this week."

And here's another conversation:

Realtor: Have you thought about dropping your listing price? It's a competitive market out there.

Me: Gulp. Okay.

And yet another...

Anne: Did you call the painter, make the hotel reservation, call the handyman, pick out the paint colors, and speak to the realtor?

Me: Yes. Did you clean the house, pick up the dog at the kennel, get the rugs from the cleaners, and return the carpet swatches?

Anne: Yes. Bye. Love you.

Me: Okay. Love you. Bye.

SIGH.

That should give you a general picture of things around here.

On the happy side:

The kids are beautiful and well and a joy to us. My parents are settling into their new house in town and we are so thrilled to have them here!
We're getting through this period of some discomforts and uncertainty, reminding ourselves that there are far worse things than moving...

Such as losing a spouse and a parent...A friend of ours in town lost her husband after a year-long battle with leukemia. Their nine year old son has lost his father. We're so terribly sad for them.

I find that recently I'm feeling a bit hemmed in from different sides by bad news...the war...the economy...global warming...illness...tragic early deaths...and petty everyday worries like work deadlines, my own aches and pains, my health/diet goals and how far I fall from attaining them lately, and the worries about how long it'll take to sell, whether we'll find a new place that pleases us all, etc.

And to top it all off---the height of stupid problems---the flooring guys unplugged the tv and cable wires in the tv cabinet and now the cable won't work...no television, no DVR, no taped episodes of the Colbert Report, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and The Office to watch after getting the kids to bed...That's been my stress-valve lately and I miss it.

Comcast comes tomorrow afternoon, free of charge, to re-plug all the wires and bring Steve Carrell back into my living room. And in my stressed out world world lately, that's a good, good thing.

And now back to our program...

2007-10-17T20:50:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the long "commercial break" between blog entries. Anybody still checking in here? (Making a big assumption that I have a loyal readership...testing, testing...anyone out there?!)

Well, it's been way too busy here at Casa Loco. We have been working non-stop to get our house ready to go on the market. This has involved carpet cleaning, furniture moving, wall painting, baseboard trim scrubbing, home decor staging, and lots more truly tedious tasks. We have more than 50% of our stuff in three storage units in town...and while the house looks nice, it doesn't look like our home any more and isn't a comfy place to relax. I was supposed to bleach the bathroom grout with a toothbrush tonight but I'm playing hooky in order to blog. "Fun with Grout" can wait until tomorrow evening.

October has required two "run away from home" weekends so far. The first was two weeks ago when I took Evelina and the kids to an upstate New York lake in order to let Anne focus solely on settling Mother into assisted living. (She's doing well there, by the way. It was absolutely the right thing at the right time for all of us.)

We runaways had a lovely time at the lake on Saturday, including a terrific get-together with my Aunt Susie and Uncle George. And what a glorious warm Saturday it was, the kind of deliciously unseasonably gorgeous global warming weather that my clever brother has dubbed "geo culpa" days.

To give you some idea of the lusciousness of the early October day, Evelina went water-skiing. And I'd have a photo of that event to share with you except that my memory card went ka-flooey and it seems that I've lost a whole "roll" of fun shots. I ran a memory recovery program on it and reclaimed a few precious ones...and maybe my photographer friend Tamar will be able to rescue more.

Here's one shot that thankfully survived -- Sophie (in a sun dress!) in a pile of autumn leaves.

Last weekend we all ran away to my hometown, NYC, to escape the paint fumes in our house and to see Arthur and our old friends Orla and Robert. It had also been too long since I was home and it was perfect timing for a city infusion. Although much has changed about the town since I lived there, it's still undeniably the turf that shaped me and will always have a hold on me. You can take the girl outta Brooklyn but you can't take Brooklyn outta the girl!

Here's Sophie hanging out in the Village:

Noah and Evelina turning the Astor Place cube:

Visiting the dinos at the Museum of Natural History:

Lunching at Aquavit for a taste of Sweden, New York style:

Some highlights of the weekend had no photo accompaniment, such as going down memory lane while walking around our old neighborhood, Park Slope; catching up with our friends; seeing Arthur.

Though I loved the weekend away, I returned more tired than ever and haven't caught up yet. Oh come on, who am I fooling? I haven't caught up in over a year and there's no "sleeping through the night" in sight. But even though I can't make babies who can sleep worth a damn, I do make cute ones, don't I?

Mom, this last photo of this post is for you. Sophie is saying "Hurry up and get here Grandma! I'm ready for you to feed me!"

She loves to eat and tonight she took a serious chomp out of her board book titled, aptly, FIESTA! I should have taken a photo of the corner missing and little pieces of book all over her cheeks. Talk about a love of literature.

Before I close, a quick update on our young Scout:

Noah is en route to earning a "handyman pin" in Webelos and was all excited this evening about his den meeting, where they learned how to identify engine parts; oil the gears on bicycles; use a tire gauge and pump; and then they had a ride on an older Boy Scout's go-kart. (Holy Beaver Cleaver, Batman!) But seriously, I'm so glad he's doing this and likes it. Anne and I have many things to teach him but engine parts aren't up our alley.

Well, this post has been pretty chipper given that much of the time lately Anne and I are pretty overwhelmed and exhausted, not knowing where we're going to be moving to, keeping fingers crossed that our house sells fast and full price, just so exhausted. But we're counting our blessings too...My mother-in-law is adjusting well to Assisted Living and we are looking forward to our family's new chapter...

Just have to keep paddling and we'll get there.

Baby sleeping, so I'm heading to bed.

Be Prepared!

2007-10-03T20:37:00.000-05:00

Guess who is a Boy Scout?! Or rather, a Webelos, the step before becoming a full-fledged Scout...

NOAH!

Noah's buddy D. (friends since Kindergarten) was already involved in Scouting so we thought Noah would feel comfortable joining his den. There are 7 or 8 boys and some dads involved too -- and they do manly-man things related to knots, ropes, tomahawks, building objects out of smaller objects, making fires, etc, etc. He had his first den meeting today and seemed to really enjoy it. The leader is a professor and a self-described pacifist. So let's be clear: this is far from the stereotypical homophobic, narrow-minded, war-mongering Scout image. We're excited for Noah and hopes it's a lot of fun for him.

I'm tired beyond words right now...We're moving my mother-in-law to assisted living tomorrow, a milestone that deserves it's own separate post.

Let's keep the focus on Noah right now: Here's our almost-11 year old Scout wearing his uniform for the first time, along with his good friend D...Aren't they adorable? I mean, handsome :-)

The mountain view house

2007-09-28T05:10:00.000-05:00

A quick update: After recently bidding--and losing out on--the house we shall dub the "enormous backyard with fire pit" place, we have put in a bid on "the mountain view house" and are keeping our fingers and toes crossed. We really like it. I hesitate to say "love" only because the vagaries of real estate and the big let-downs one can have.
The main issue is whether they'll accept a house-sale contingency contract. And of course we have no idea whether another bidder is nipping at our heels, but we think not. This house has almost everything on our priority list, with the exceptions of a walk-out basement (this just has those tiny upper windows) and a flat yard (it's yard is on a slope, but some landscaping to regrade the lot can fix that...and we're picturing a stone retaining wall and recirculating waterfall trickling down the rocks!)
Our current house is so jumbo-sized that all rooms look small by comparison, but in reality the mountain view house has just the right amount of space for a family of four, plus doggie. Some photos to give a feel of the place:

The view from the front porch:

The front porch:

Part of the back yard:

Evelina and Sophie on the back deck:

More photos to come if we buy this house --- and a pitiful, lamenting post to come if we do not. You're forewarned!

Speaking of Sophie, today she turns 10 months old, in honor of which I will try to post my first "audio diary" installment on this blog over the weekend. Stay tuned!

Life or reality tv?

2007-09-25T20:28:00.000-05:00

My life lately is like an over-the-top reality tv show..."Melissa and her family are packing all their possessions and hoping their house sells FAST but they haven't yet found their new dream house...Where will they end up? What if they find a house they love before they sell their current home? (It happened. We lost the bid.) Will the sellers accept a contingency contract? (Not usually.) And will a room become available in assisted living for 91 year old Nana before moving day? Tune in next time..."

Hmm...I don't think I'd watch that show, come to think of it! Who needs borrowed stress? The best way to handle it is to try (very hard sometimes!) to think of this tv show as more comedy than drama...

And there are plenty of comedic elements. For instance, my mother-in-law has become obsessed with sweepstakes and is constantly seeking Anne's help in filling out the forms...which is EXACTLY what my grandmother began to do after she turned 90. Is there a Publishers Clearinghouse gene that switches on if you make it into the nonagenarian stage of life?

Also funny in a punch-drunk-with-sleep-deprivation sort of way: When we're up in the middle of the night (which we are several times due to Sophie's restlessness,) Anne and I have gotten into some serious fits of laughter over the most ridiculous things...A word that sounds funny to us...Or Anne's recounting of a dream she'd just woken up from in which she went to "sock heaven" and was surrounded by a fluffy mountain of lost socks. The thing that made us laugh even harder was her thought--mid-dream--that her dream's plot would make a fantastic television show. When, of course, NOTHING could be more boring to imagine than an hour-long drama about a woman sitting in the middle of a pile of socks!

And I guess it's also somewhat amusing that, at this very moment in our lives when we couldn't be busier, Anne and I signed up for a local weekly (all female couples) ballroom and Latin dance class. First dance: SWING! And I've been totally bitten by the swing bug...I'm thinking about it all the time now and look forward to the class all week. Slow, slow, quick-quick...

Back to real estate for a moment--This week we're going back for a second look at a home we saw briefly a month ago and didn't fall in love with. But the more we think about it, the more we feel it may, in fact, have most of the things on our wish list. When we saw it the first time, it was at night in a huge rainstorm and we had a crying baby with us...not the most ideal way to view a home. I just remember thinking "I hate that chandelier...Let's go home!" But we've been driving by it again and again...so we're going to look this week on a hopefully sunny afternoon and without a crying baby. It's the perfect location for us, has a finished basement (or Lower Level as realtors have instructed us to say instead of the nasty "B" word) and has an open floor plan between the kitchen and the family room, which I especially wanted -- since we love that feature in our current house. Some other perks: a hot tub on the back deck, a front porch, and a view (the house sits up a bit on a hill and you can see mountains in the distance). Drawbacks: The back yard is tiny and we might have to get a landscaper to level some of the sloped area and create a retaining wall...pricey. Anyway, I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much. We'll see how this unfolds.

Well, folks, since this post doesn't have any images that go with it (except perhaps one of me on Saturday with a splitting migraine? Or how about a photo of the mountain of clothing in our closets as we sort through stuff?) I'll leave you with some more appealing recent shots: our kids all dressed up for Rosh Hashanah. (Noah has since had a hair cut!) More photos and posts to come.

Sophie loves to sit on her brother's lap...

And he really loves his baby sister. It fills my heart to see them together.

I love their expressions in this shot!

With Grandma and Grandpa right before they left town. Hurry back soon!

L'shana tovah!

2007-09-13T03:59:00.000-05:00

In the midst of a whirlwind of activity in our lives, we are pausing today to celebrate Rosh Hashanah!

Here's sweet Sophie to wish everyone a happy and healthy new year!

A moving experience

2007-09-13T03:03:00.000-05:00

This is the post where I finally show you what's going on around here and why my last posts refer to being so busy...

We are moving!

It became clear recently that my mother-in-law, almost 91 years old, needs to move to assisted living. (She has lived with us for five years.) We bought our current house for its very large master bedroom and bath suite on the main floor--and it's been perfect for her. But without her living here, the house is too large for the four of us.

When we returned from our summer vacation, we made the decision to get some big changes rolling...

Anne and I are ready for a new chapter in our family's life to begin (staying in our same town though).

So we're painting...

and packing...

and rearranging...

and getting old stuff out the door...here are the remnants of our massive garage sale last weekend:

Wish us strength and luck!

What I did on my summer vacation

2007-08-30T07:43:00.000-05:00

I hope to write a proper update about our summer this weekend. Until then, I thought I'd do the quickie version with some photos...After all, a picture is worth a thousand words!

During the first weekend of Noah's violin institute, we drove to Niagara Falls. Though we'd been there before, I never tire of seeing this sight!

The next weekend, when his institute was over, we traveled (in a comically overpacked mini-van!) to Maine, stopping overnight in Connecticut for a visit with my aunt and uncle. Great to see them!

We ate dinner outside and watched the sun set on the beautiful lake they live beside.

The next day, we drove to the beautiful Maine coast...

...and to the cute little cabin we rented near my parents' house.

We had a wonderful reunion with my parents and Noah got to spend quality time with them.
Grandma and Grandpa are very important to Noah!

Summer in Maine means blueberries...and here's the yummy pie Noah made with Grandma.

One of my favorite things about vacations is spending lots of time with my darling boy.
He's growing up so fast and is such a special person. In addition to all his terrific qualities (bright, caring, talented) Noah is a deeply soulful person, attuned to nature, beauty, the sensuality of being alive.

During our second week in Maine, Mary & MaryAnn and the kids (our children's half-sibs and good buddies) arrived for four wonderful days together. Sophie was in her glory with all the attention from her three funny brothers and sweet sister Maggie!

We treasure our relationship with our "halfies" and Anne & I count Mary & Mary Ann as close friends and "sister-moms" as one of the kids dubbed us. Always fun hanging out together!

We also feel lucky that Mary Ann's parents have become part of our extended family as well. The kids now all have half-grandparents, in addition to half-siblings! We are so glad that Aime and Kathy joined us for several days in Maine (photo to be added soon!)

On our trip home from Maine, we stopped in New Hampshire to see our very dear friend Louise...

...and overnight in Northampton, Massachusetts to meet my long-lost cousin Nava--great to connect with her!

Once we got home, we got back into our routines, including our daily checking on the construction of Grandma and Grandpa's new home. Yes, later this fall they are moving from Maine to our town in Pennsylvania and we're so excited! Here's how the house looked when we got back in early August. (The exterior is all done now and they're putting in the floors and cabinets...new photos to come!)

Well, hope you enjoyed the brief sketch of our summer. I'm in the midst of creating a summer photo slide show which I'll post soon. And since I've teased you by mentioning how busy we are and much change is going on in our lives now, I'll add that we're thinking of selling our too-large house when my mother-in-law goes into assisted living, so we're busy house-hunting. It'll take a lot of work to accomplish this change, but we're pretty excited about starting this new chapter. More on this--and other topics (Noah starting 5th grade, Sophie's sleep issues, my health challenges, etc.) in the next post.

Sophie turns 9 months old today!

2007-08-28T15:13:00.000-05:00

To any readers who might have checked in during the last month or so, my apologies for the hiatus. The good news is we're back, we're fine (although busy beyond belief...more on that soon) and we had a fun vacation in Maine, with stops in Connecticut, New Hampshire and Massachusetts to see friends and family.

A long post is coming with our full family update!

But for now, let me announce with pride that today Sophie is 9 months old! She's been out as long as she was in. And she's growing up so beautifully, if a bit too fast for her lovestruck mommies! Here are a couple summertime photos of our darling to tide you over until a longer posting:

Bravo!

2007-07-16T21:49:00.001-05:00

A little Bach in the afternoon

This is Noah's fourth summer attending a music school in the Northeast. It's a great experience, something he looks forward to all year. For the last two summers, I've conserved my vacation days by joining Anne and Noah there on the weekends (it's two weeks) and the highlight is always the all-school recital on Friday afternoons.

Portrait of the artist as a young fiddler

Most of his training is in classical music, but his year, Noah added fiddling class and really loved the new challenge, especially the speed required! We had a very touching family moment when Anne and I joined a "doh-si-doh" dance while Noah played up on stage. How fun to dance to music your son is making!

Get well wishes!

2007-07-16T21:42:00.001-05:00

Noah and Sophie have a wonderful half-sister named Carolyn who was recently in a car accident and broke a couple bones. This photo was taken a few weeks before the accident during a recent visit. We're sending lots of love her way and are so grateful it wasn't worse. Get well soon Carolyn!

Cultural Exchange

2007-07-09T07:51:00.000-05:00

Still life with Lingonberry Jam, Pennsylvania Dutch Mustard and Jewish Borscht

There's so much to learn when you host an au pair in your home...and for the au pair, it's a really huge experience to be steeped in a foreign culture (and a family's home life) for a year. So far, I think we're all adjusting well. I can see that the important thing is to keep lines of communication open. For instance, Evelina recently told us that she's been going hungry in our house in the evenings because she's used to eating dinner by 5pm or earlier. We felt so terrible to think she'd been hungry in our home! We typically eat between 6 and 7 pm, depending on what's going on. We assumed she would have a little snack around 3 or 4 to tide her over, as we often do. But she's not in the habit of snacking at all, so she was literally lightheaded with hunger before she told us "I can't wait this long for dinner." While we'd like to all eat dinner together, it looks like that may not work out...We literally cannot get dinner on the table that early. Anne and I work until 5 and during the school year, we frequently have evening activities: Noah's violin lessons, Hebrew School, karate, etc. So we all decided that Evelina would take her own dinner when she gets off work at 5 and we'll pick one night a week (Wednesdays are usually free) to make an early supper and eat together around 5:30. Evelina said she might like to cook a Swedish meal for us on those nights. Sounds good. It's easy to forget that Americans are much more casual in general than Europeans, including about our mealtimes. There are aspects of that casualness I don't like--for instance, when it leads to us eating junk food--but there's also something freeing about the flexibility of fitting meals into our busy (and fun) family activities. I'm sure we'll all find a good compromise for our new Swedish-Jewish-Pennsylvanian household!

Belated happy Fourth of July!

2007-07-09T07:33:00.000-05:00

The Fourth is a pretty big holiday in our house. Anne and I met at a Fourth of July party (in Park Slope, Brooklyn, circa 1991) so it's an anniversary for us. We also happen to live in a house that has a fantastic view of the town's impressive fireworks display. So naturally this led us to institute the annual July 4 potluck at our place...a fun event we look forward to from one year to the next. Every year's party seems to develop an after-the-fact nickname. Such as: The Year It Rained and We All Got Soaked. Or The Year Melissa Served Uncooked Salmon. And who could forget The Year Max Sang The National Anthem?! This year will go down as The Swedish Meatball July 4th. Yes, the night before the party, Evelina and I stayed up until almost 11 p.m. rolling and frying HUNDREDS of meatballs. Almost two big trays were gobbled up at the party and we have two bags of meatballs in the freezer for Evelina to cook up if she gets homesick for the national dish. I didn't take any photos at the party, sadly, but it was a really good one this year: a fabulous bluegrass trio playing, kids frolicking, and about 80 friends hanging out in the house, on the deck and on the lawn. I did manage to take next-morning post-party photos. Here's one of Miss Sophie kicking back with Babysongs while Mommy cleans up. Note the Peace Flag, a fixture at our July 4th bashes. If you're interested in seeing the leftover beer and dirty dishes (!!) as well as the Swedish flag (okay, flag towel!) we hung up, just click through to Flickr from the photo below. Hope you all had a great 4th!

Off and running

2007-07-03T23:31:00.000-05:00

Sorry to go for so long without an update...It's been crazy-busy here! It's past midnight so I'll keep this brief for now. This past Friday (has it only been five days!) Evelina arrived here from Sweden (or to be more exact, from NYC after a three-day au pair agency training program there). It's all going well so far and we're looking forward to a fun year with her. She seems like an easy-going, bright and mature young woman...And she's very outdoorsy and athletic which is fun, especially for Noah.

At yesterday's picnic supper in the park, Noah and Evelina raced. Sweden took the gold medal, U.S.A. the silver.

Evelina posing in the doorway of the quaint covered bridge. Welcome to America!

Most importantly, Sophie and Evelina are hitting it off well. Here they are together on the swings!

A couple other odds and ends to report: As of June 28th, Sophie is now 7 months old! I meant to do a whole 7 month update post (lots to say about her development...she's doing great!) but it'll have to wait for a bit. A couple weeks ago, Sophie developed an awful rash, mostly on her elbows, upper thigh and face. Diagnosis: Eczema. It seems to run in the family, perhaps on the donor's side. The poor itchy miserable girl! Neither of us slept much for a few nights--she'd wake up crying and clawing at her itchy skin. Thank goodness the various remedies we're trying have started to help. It's MUCH better now, almost healed. Hope it stays away!

Okay, that's the mini-report from our house. All is well. Big July 4th party here tomorrow, our annual event complete with view of local fireworks...so excuse me while I put the beer in the fridge and collapse into bed. Have a good holiday!

Her best teacher

2007-06-24T22:05:00.000-05:00

Sophie will be 7 months old this Thursday and she is getting quite close to crawling. She gets up on her hands and knees and rocks back and forth like a piston, with a wide grin of self-satisfaction on her face. Just recently she's started throwing her hand out in front of her...She's getting the idea and it won't be long before we're racing after her! While that's all very exciting, what I really want to make note of is the relationship between Noah and Sophie. Beyond what I could say about what a truly sensitive, attentive and caring big brother he is, Anne and I have noticed something else between these two: They gaze into each other's eyes and it's clear that they have a very special bond. She adores him and the feeling is mutual. Part of our motivation to have another baby (at ages 41 and 57!) came from our desire for Noah to grow up with a sibling at home. We hoped they'd be close--but with ten years between them, we didn't know what to expect. It's hard to convey in words (especially on a very exhausted Sunday night) the deeply connected spiritual vibe we feel between them...except to say simply that they were made to be together, as we all were as family. What a miracle. Here they are at Friday's picnic dinner, working on the crawling technique:

A man among men

2007-06-24T21:59:00.000-05:00

A quick report on the bar mitzvah of my nephew Jacob: What a wonderful occasion! Jacob did splendidly well and made us all so proud. And the food, company, and partying all weekend were all very special. Here's the young man himself, flanked by his dad (my brother Ben) and his grandpa (my dad Ralph) on the evening before his bar mitzvah. Three special guys!

Remembering JEB

2007-06-24T21:57:00.001-05:00

Originally uploaded by Mommy Sasa

My unique and wonderful Grandma Jean died two years ago. Today is her birthday and I'm really missing being able to talk to her. And I especially wish I could see her reaction to Sophie--she loved babies and I know would have adored my little one. On my last visit with her, in early June (she died suddenly a week later on June 14) I told her that I was going to try to have another baby soon. Her reaction was "Oh Melissa! You're going to have a girl!" So although Grandma never met Sophie, I am comforted by the idea that she knew she was on the way...even before we conceived her! Grandma's name was Jean Esther and Sophie's Hebrew name is Johanna Esther in her memory. (Johanna was also Grandma's grandmother's name.) What's more, Grandma's last name and ours both start with B. so another J.E.B. came into the family when Sophie was born. Happy Birthday Grandma. We miss you all the time!

So much going on!

2007-06-14T22:02:00.001-05:00

Here's a rare post without photos. This one is more of a quick rant about being a wee bit overwhelmed (understatement). The photo that might fit best is The Scream by Edard Munch...and the caption might read "Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! There's SO MUCH going on and SO MUCH to do!" Most are good things--and, in general, I do like to be on the go...but I just need to whine a tiny bit since I'm a bit tired (another understatement) and stretched quite thin.

In the next days and weeks, we have:
my nephew's bar mitzvah out of town
old friends visiting for the weekend
Jess's last day as our nanny
Evelina arriving from Sweden
evaluating assisted living for my mother-in-law
keeping an eye on the building site for my parents' new house

And all this against the backdrop of Noah being out of school, impending writing deadlines at work, Sophie teething and not sleeping, and a fibro pain flare-up. Plus the adjustment (physical and emotional) of phasing out my telecommuting work arrangement.

In order to not spiral downwards physically, I must make time somehow to exercise. And make fresh juices. And eat well--which, for me, means mostly raw fruits and veggies. So no stress eating/carb binges--sheesh! That means WILL POWER which we all know is hard to muster when one is exhausted. There's my vicious circle right there.

I intended to go to the first session of Aqua Mom water workout this week and I was too tired to make it. That's pretty pathetic. Sophie's sleeping right now and I've got to do some laundry and pack. Sigh.

Okay--I'll stop whining now. Here's a more positive reframing of things:
I'm so proud of my nephew and am looking forward to the bar mitzvah.
I'm also looking forward to our friends' visit and Evelina's arrival -- and need to remind myself that the house doesn't have to be super tidy right now.
I can try again this coming week with the swim class.
So what if I'm, er, pleasantly plump at the moment? I'll slim down this year and--while I may have gained too much during the pregnancy, I've got a baby to show for it. After this weekend, I'm going to be the juicing queen again and get back into my fibro-reversal food choices.

Send some energetic thoughts in my direction! Have a great weekend everyone.

So much going on!

2007-06-14T21:32:00.000-05:00

Summer is here

2007-06-02T22:45:00.000-05:00

Anne's the family gardener, I'm the photographer, and so it's natural that many photos of the garden will ensue. It's a good partnership. I've gathered up some recent shots that celebrate early summer 2007. The roses are out--gorgeous despite the beatle-bitten leaves--and the peonies are in full display, their lush heavy petals already starting to drop. The irises are out and so is the stand of catnip. I tried to capture the heavenly tinge of color of a single stalk of lavender just starting to emerge. Amidst it all, here we are--happy to run outside without coats and boots, so happy to be able to go barefoot, sit on the deck swing, and look at the moon from the front steps, catching the cool summer night breeze. Guthrie's into everything we do, of course...the world's least fru-fru poodle, just jumping right in and looking for excitement. Here's a glimpse. Louise, this slide show is especially for you with its "dog in the flower beds" theme!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Adoption Day

2007-06-02T21:25:00.000-05:00

I'm a day late in celebrating GLBT Blogging Day, but I'll add my voice to the chorus anyway...We're here, we're queer, we're blogging about our kids, get used to it :-)

Fittingly, yesterday was our second-parent adoption hearing for Anne's adoption of Sophie. When we went through this process for her adoption of Noah, we didn't document the occasion with photos. Our lawyer asked if we wanted her to take one and we declined. Everyone thinks of adoption as cause for celebration--and understandably some folks like to congratulate us on becoming legal co-parents and our state for having same-sex second-parent adoption.

And we are glad to be able to both be on record as legal parents, for sure. We didn't pursue Anne's adoption of Noah until he was six and we had moved out of New York, a state in which I would have had to rescind my parental rights in order to then adopt my own son along with Anne. There was no way in hell that was ever going to happen.

This time around, we mellowed a bit, accepted the congrats more willingly and snapped the photos.

But despite all this good cheer, let me go on record as stating that--along with our relief in having this step finalized--we're still pissed that we had to jump through hoops and pay for Anne to adopt her own child. A child whose entire existence came about through our marriage, our planning, our hard work. A child who--and I won't go into details!--is who she is because Anne was part of facilitating the "sperm meeting egg" moment. A child conceived in our bed. OUR CHILD. HER CHILD. Adoption is a beautiful thing, but our children are not adopted!

And yet they are. As of Friday, June 1st. End of rant. We shall resume being grateful for the crumbs of legality offered us.

Now for the photos!

Sophie fell asleep on the way to the courthouse. Being adopted is a snooze!

Waiting for the judge. Both children had to be present. Noah was intrigued and perhaps a little nervous about the whole thing.

Signed, sealed, delivered, she's yours...

The official "It's Official" photo

"I now pronounce you Mother and Daughter..."

Mommy's kisses

Morning nap, early summer

2007-05-31T22:19:00.000-05:00

A beautiful sight. Sweet dreams, little darling!

P.S. Wish us luck tomorrow--we have to be at the courthouse bright and early for Anne's second-parent adoption of Sophie Isabelle!

Six months old today!

2007-05-28T22:24:00.000-05:00

Dear Sophie,
You are six months old today! When we dreamed about having a baby, we always pictured a little girl exactly like you...and here you are. We are so blessed!

At six months old, we already know so many things about you...

We know you're going to say "I want to do it all by myself" because you already prefer it that way...and you want to do everything the big folks are doing...Like drinking from a glass...Mmm, that water looks good, mommy. Give ME some!

In so many ways, you remind us of your big brother Noah as a baby...We know you are super curious and smart. And you hate naps and only take the shortest ones possible because you don't want to miss a thing. You also have the same serious expression when you are examining new things and new faces.

Of course, you do plenty of things differently than Noah...in your very own special way. You are so alert to changes in our expressions, moods and voices. You are strong (very!) and independent, but you also love to snuggle. Several people have described you as "saucy" or "cheeky" because of your willful nature and also that adorable, sly smile that looks as if you've just heard a really witty private joke. You love music, especially songs (especially when all of us sing to you at once) and also love kicking up a storm at bathtime. More than anything, though, you love your family. And you adore your big brother...When he's in the room, you don't take your eyes off him! And he sure loves you too.

As we all do so much, darling Sophie.

Happy six month birthday!

Layout advice needed!

2007-05-25T05:29:00.000-05:00

Hi folks. Can anyone out there (Sarah??!) tell me how to get the blog title off the photo mosaic? I'd like to bring the mosaic down and have the blog title above it. I'd also like to center the title and the mosaic. And I'd like to insert the html code for Sophie's Lilypie ticker underneath the mosaic. Let me know if you have any ideas.
Thanks!
Melissa

Name that hippo!

2007-05-17T22:13:00.000-05:00

Every girl needs a hippo ballerina, n'est-ce pas?! Sophie triple-loves this dainty dancer (purchased for her by nanny Jess...thank you Jess!) but thus far she remains nameless. We call her "that hippo" or "not that doll, the other one" -- so if you have any suggestions for more dignified monikers, let us know!

My doll and her doll

Happy Mother's Day!

2007-05-13T22:55:00.001-05:00

A view into the beautiful garden Anne has created for us.
Thank you, honey! You're the best and we love you!

Noah's first chess tournament

2007-05-08T23:45:00.000-05:00

As some of you know, this past weekend we traveled to a chess tournament for Noah's first competition. Check out the slide show below to get a feel for the unique world of competitive chess. We were concerned about how he'd react to the intensity of the atmosphere...Silly us! Noah took it in stride and--after six hours of playing chess--he left the tournament saying he couldn't wait to be in another one! When we were walking out to the car, he said "Do you know what I want as my prize?I want you to let me teach you how to play." Gulp. I guess I'll HAVE to submit to learning now. (Like all things involving logic, math, or strategy, my eyes glaze over and my brain goes into "does not compute" mode!)

Anyway, enough blathering...Here's our very own chess pro!

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

The Unbearable Cuteness of Being

2007-05-04T20:06:00.000-05:00

My two darlings

Sophie Isabelle: Ready for Anything!

Because One Never Knows When This Knowledge Will Come in Handy...

Pure Joy

Live action Sophie!

2007-05-03T23:56:00.000-05:00

As if eating a banana wasn't enough for one day, Sophie also went on a swing for the very first time today. Grandpa was on hand with his trusty mini videocam to record the historic occasion. So here we all are...Listen close for everyone telling me "Let go of her!" Yes, I'm a wee bit...let's call it careful!

A Day to Remember!

2007-05-03T23:41:00.000-05:00

Today was a red letter day for Sophie and her admirers! Although we intend to wait until she's six months old to introduce daily solid food, we gave in just this once to Grandma's ardent wishes to be the first one to feed Sophie her first non-milk meal, just as she did with Noah way back when. (Those who know my mom know just how ardent she can be!) Since my parents are leaving in a few days for a couple months, we decided to let her go ahead with The Great Banana Experiment. Again, if you know her, you can just imagine how happy this made her...and we like to believe that somewhere Grandma Jean was smiling over this scene too--"The baby's STARVING!" Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a taste of what happened...
P.S. Not five minutes had passed since Sophie's banana-fest when Grandma began exclaiming over the astounding effects the food had on her development...It was plain to see that Sophie was now babbling MORE than before the bananas (B.B.) and the babble really was starting to sound like words and sentences now that we were in the P.B. (post-banana) era. And didn't we notice how much better Sophie could sit now that she had ingested some banana? Love you Mom!

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Movie mania

2007-04-29T08:59:00.001-05:00

153_5397
Originally uploaded by mockstar.

I don't do these blog quizzes too often, but when I saw this movie-related one, I thought it would be fun to post...since watching movies ranks very high among my favorite things to do.
So here goes...
1. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times.
There are many. MANY. But the queen of 'em all is the Wizard of Oz. Poppies....Poppies....Poppies will put them to sleep!
2.Name a movie that you’ve seen multiple times in the theater.
I saw Brokeback Mountain twice in the theater and then three times on DVD since then. Such a weepy. Gorgeous mountains, gorgeous people, sad, sad, sad...and then there's that score by Gustavo Santaolalla.
3.Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie.
Wow, lots...From the highbrow--Helen Mirren, William Macy, Jodie Foster, Kevin Spacey, Frances McDormand--to the mainstream--Will Smith, Drew Barrymore, Adam Sandler--to the indy/quirky John/Joan Cusack, (my theory is they're the same person),Catherine Keener, Steve Carell, Paul Giamatti--to the somewhat lower brow but fun--Jack Black, Will Ferrell, Brendan Fraser (Blast from the Past, anyone?), Alicia Silverstone,
4.Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie. Nicolas Cage. Brad Pitt. MEL GIBSON.
5.Name a movie that you can and do quote from.
My Cousin Vinny; Best in Show; This is Spinal Tap; Grapes of Wrath; The Graduate
6.Name a movie musical that you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs. The Wizard of Oz, natch.
7.Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with.
My Fair Lady...By George, she's got it!
8.Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see.
Different recommendations for different moods:
PMS: Chocolat
Feeling down: Clueless
70s nostalgia: Saturday Night Fever
Family night: Singin' in the Rain, A NIght at the Opera
Animated: Aristocats (great music, old fashioned animation AND Eva Gabor as Duchess)
Out of this world: Close Encounters of the Third Kind
New York state of mind: Annie Hall
Epic: Ten Commandments "So let it be written, So let it be done"
Holiday Weepy: It's a Wonderful Life

I'll add to this list when I think of some more! Pop up some popcorn and get a seat on the couch for me ;-)

My three girls

2007-04-28T16:50:00.000-05:00

My folks are coming home tomorrow from several weeks in the southwest -- including an adventurous group kayaking trip on the Colorado River in Utah. We're looking forward to seeing them. I'm sure they'll have lots of photos to share...and maybe I'll even post one here. Until then, here's a pretty picture of my three girls, taken a few weeks ago.

Five months old today!

2007-04-28T11:15:00.001-05:00

5MonthsOld
Originally uploaded by Mommy Sasa.

Happy five month birthday, Sophie Isabelle! You filled a longing in our hearts and made our family complete. We love you!!! And we're enjoying every minute of our adventure together, watching you and your brother grow up so beautifully.

Some stats from her well-baby check-up yesterday:

At five months old, Sophie weighs 16 pounds and is 26 inches tall. She is on target with all her developmental milestones...Wants to bypass crawling and shoot right to standing and walking, since she ALWAYS wants to be vertical and on her feet!

She had her first tiny snippet of a haircut the other day, courtesy of Mommy Anne who couldn't stand her straggly sideburns any more!

Sophie has discovered her voice this past month and expresses her opinions--mimicking our conversational tones--loudly and with great flair! And, as you can tell by this drooly-faced photo, our girl is teething big time! We think a tiny tooth is starting to push up from the lower front area.

And the winner is...

2007-04-27T20:06:00.001-05:00

Plaque
Originally uploaded by Mommy Sasa.

Noah!

Guess who won his school's science fair last Saturday!?!

Yup, our guy!

His school will have his name engraved on the plaque he is holding in this photo.

We are so proud of our smart and talented (and funny and handsome and kind and lovable) young man.

His project examined whether people can identify genetically-related people by looking at facial features--and his exhibit featured a display of children's photos which included his seven half-brothers and sisters, along with Noah's photo. He did a very thorough job interviewing 82 people and analyzing the data.

Way to go, sweetheart!

Hurry nanny!

2007-04-26T21:41:00.001-05:00

Mary_Poppins_(1964)
Originally uploaded by miss.chaos.

If you want this choice position, have a cheery disposition. Rosy cheeks. No warts. Play games, all sorts! You must be kind, you must be witty. Very sweet and fairly pretty. We won't hide your spectacles so you can't see, put toads in your bed or pepper in your tea. Hurry nanny!
Many thanks, Sincerely, Noah and Sophie B.

Yes, our wonderful nanny Jess has been accepted into law school and will be moving out of town-- Imagine the nerve of her...wanting to get an education and have a bright future when we need her here! (Joking, joking!)

So the choice position of caring for our children (well, mostly our little Miss) is open--and we've decided to try something new this time:

We've signed up with an au pair agency and are waiting to interview some young women (calling them at home in Sweden, the Netherlands, Germany, etc) to see if we can find just the right person.

Or maybe we should just write a letter, rip it up and let the pieces find their way up the chimney...and then wait for the rap on the door. Mary Poppins, where are you????

A special weekend with family

2007-04-16T18:22:00.000-05:00

Family is our biggest blessing...and we feel so lucky that our family has grown to include Noah and Sophie's half-siblings. Have a look at a recent fun get-together with one branch of our family tree!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

A jolly jumper

2007-04-13T00:38:00.000-05:00

Sophie loves her jumparoo! Her smart brother helped us put it together.

Four and a half months old!

2007-04-12T23:51:00.000-05:00

This photo really captures our Sophie's personality, very sweet and smart and a little saucy! She has started to babble and coo more--and often seems to pipe up to join our conversation with an expressive sentence of her own. She definitely has opinions--"a real mind of her own!" as my Grandma Jean used to say. We wouldn't have it any other way!

Here are a few other recent milestones to catch you up with Sophie's many "firsts" on record. So far, she:

has turned over from her side to her back...only a couple of times but it's coming along
sits supported in her Bumbo seat...terrific head control now
has started enjoying "peek a boo"...she has the cutest chuckle which I hope to be able to share here on a little video we have of her. Coming soon!
can hold things with two hands and can pass things from one hand to the other...we are almost certain she is left handed like her Grandma and Grandpa!
is starting to teethe and drool...we've reached the "everything goes in the mouth" stage

Some other details... In her brief time here thus far, Sophie has:

attended several concerts, mostly her brother's Suzuki violin recitals
met many of her relatives
dressed up as Queen Esther for Purim
hiked in the woods
been to a resort hotel
attended a bat mitzvah
stayed home with a baby sitter

And a few more fun facts about this little light of our lives:

She almost always wakes up smiling!
Her favorite toy is her Madeleine doll.
She is very strong.
She has discovered the joys of thumbsucking and concentrates hard on inserting her thumb into her mouth.
She LOVES to practice standing up (with our support of course!) and we suspect she'll be an early walker.
She dislikes hats that come down too low on her forehead and hates having hiccups.
She loves to study Grandma's face and gives Nana big smiles.
She enjoys water and likes to splash in the big-girl tub (with Mommy) and even practices swimming on her tummy.

That's the update!

New sweater!

2007-03-27T17:02:00.000-05:00

To her friend the talented knitter, Sophie says,
"I love my new sweater and hat!"
The perfect thing for spring...THANK YOU!

Tax time

2007-03-24T21:19:00.000-05:00

Mommy Anne gets a little help with taxes
from her littlest assistant!

Who knew paperwork could be such fun?!

The busy executive

Sign on the dotted line please

The sound of music

2007-03-20T23:45:00.000-05:00

Music is an important part of our lives and is a priority in our family life. Each of my parents had one very musical parent -- Grandma Irene was a pianist and Grandpa Milton played accordion. This had a big impact on my folks growing up: My mom is a musician and my father is a lifelong music lover and has a very nice singing voice, inherited from his grandfather Farkas, a cantor.

Music has always been part of my relationship with Anne. She plays piano and enjoys the same eclectic mix of music that I do. I love to sing and was in a folk-rock girl group for a while in grad school. So it was a given for us that music would be a big part of our household and our children's upbringing.

Grandma gives Sophie her first piano lesson.

I was thinking recently about how responsible parents are for creating the "family culture" that the children grow up absorbing, all based on what the grown-ups think rates highest in the "best things in life" category.

For instance, we aren't into watching professional athletics on television...Don't know much about teams and players.

If Noah ever wants to watch a game or join a team, we'd be fine with it...but it's not a priority for us. And whether by influence or inherent temperment, he's not into it so far. Of course, for some parents, joining a soccer or basketball team is seen as a huge part of childhood and would be a "must" for their kids.

For us, one of the most essential things is music. We're pretty flexible about some other things, but lessons are non-negotiables in our parenting agenda.

Other things that top our "family culture" list:

Enjoying nature -- hikes, lakes, the ocean.

Humor -- seeing the funny side of life, word play, irony, laughing at ourselves.

Games -- Scrabble, chess, Boggle, Pictionary -- we like to play.

Food -- slow food, real food, fresh food, health food.

Art -- museums, movies, photography, poetry, dance -- we want our kids to love art as much as we do.

Spirituality/Jewishness -- religion and heritage as something that feeds the soul and gives us community roots, being part of a long, fascinating tradition and carrying it forward into the future.

Progressive Politics -- Goes without saying in our house. Bring the troops home NOW!

What kind of things are given highest priority in your family's culture? What things are non-negotiables? Kind of interesting to ponder.

Our fiddler

2007-03-20T23:40:00.000-05:00

Here's another face that melts my heart -- our handsome fiddler, relaxing at home.

That face!

2007-03-20T23:18:00.000-05:00

This post has only one thing to say:
Oh, that face! So so so love, love, love that face!

Ready to tell mommy something...

TBHM (Tired But Happy Mama)

2007-03-20T23:02:00.000-05:00

I couldn't tolerate that scraggly long post-partum hairdo any longer and had it chopped off this evening...Back to my standard shoulder-length bob. It's my pre-pregnancy look (Well, with an additional 40 lbs but those'll drop off soon, right? Play along and nod comfortingly ;-)

So, here I am, a TBHM...captured by my Mac's Photo Booth mere minutes ago, sitting up late as usual, trying to catch up on all manner of loose ends, listening to Dylan, Springsteen and Sheryl Crow tonight as I type, and listening in on the baby monitor to soft little puffs of breath and sleeping sighs coming from Sophie's crib. When those turn to hungry little grunts and whimpers, that'll be my cue to ditch my post and call it a night. Whew!

Happy Pi Day!

2007-03-14T21:42:00.001-05:00

Cherry Pie!
Originally uploaded by Snutur.

Happy Pi Day everyone! "What?" you ask. Well, come on! You know what I'm talking about... Pi Day, March 14, otherwise known as 3-14, the first three numbers in the infinte digit called Pi which represents the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter, always remaining the same number no matter which circle you use to compute it.

(Impressed by my knowledge? Don't be! Purely copying off a math forum!)

While you shouldn't be impressed by me, feel free to be wowed by Noah who was the one to excitedly announce Pi Day to the entire household this morning. For math geeks everywhere (and apparently I gave birth to one ten years ago) today is an important holiday!

Noah has been fascinated by Pi for quite some time and has committed to memory the first 20 numbers in the (infinite) string, adding 5 more at a time by repeating the new batch while we're driving around town. You'll hear from the back seat his sweet, determined voice chanting "64338" or "19716" ...and then a pause and a correction...more chanting...and then a very soft but ebullient "Yes!"

Quite fittingly, somehow, Noah had an exciting day planned in advance with his young compadres--a subset of the math geeks, known as the chess heads. He was invited to the home of some new acquaintances of ours, a professor whose 9 year old son is winning tournaments already. Noah was invited into this inner circle of chess kids for a four-hour chess fest. Lest you think they did nothing but chess, I assure you they also played "bughouse"...a diverting version of chess you play when you need a break from playing chess. Get my drift?!

Grandma Martha offered to drive him to the professor's house after first taking him for lunch at Wegmans. And while at the supermarket Noah decided that it would be fitting to buy a pie and bring it to the chess meet on Pi Day. (He had briefly considered bringing pineapple or pine nuts or pizza but settled quickly on the classic sound-alike dessert.) The chess heads took one look at the pie and got the joke instantly. Naturally. Who wouldn't?

And that, dear readers, is how it came to pass that five 8, 9 and 10 year old boys ate cherry pie on Pi Day. Hmm...58910...I wonder if that's a piece of Pi?!

Bridge

2007-03-05T00:33:00.001-05:00

Walk the Sheep.
Originally uploaded by jayhoc.

I moved a lot as a kid...about fourteen times in my first nine years. I spent the next nine in Brooklyn, where my parents were from and where most of my family lived: Grandma and Grandpa in Manhattan Beach; Grandma Jean in Sheepshead Bay; Great-Grandma Dinah in Brighton. After so much uprooting and moving, it was good to be home, my parents said.

I'd only known them as Californians but now that we were back east their Brooklyn accents revived; they talked with their hands; they laughed more. We had big Sunday breakfasts with everyone eating bialys, pletzel, pot cheese, cream cheese, whitefish, coffee, bitter orange marmalade, lox, eggs & onions, babka, poppy seed danish. Everyone talking, Betty and Mark coming by, Grandma hollering up to our terrace from the street--she was on her bike, a huge pocketbook in her handlebar basket, a folding chair strapped to the back-- letting us and all the neighbors know that it was way too bee-you-tee-ful a day to stay inside!

That meant one thing: the beach. Or more exactly Brighton Beach, Bay One, Left of the Lifeguard. Her spot. We kids never passed up a chance to ride our bikes along with her, over the rickety wooden Sheepshead Bay bridge (with its mysterious sign "Do Not Make Fast To This Bridge" which always made us test the limits--like outlaws--by racing our bikes across as fast as we could) to the cool and leafy neighborhood where Dad had grown up, where quiet streets with nouveau British names--Amherst, Beaumont, Dover, Exeter--dead-ended at the Atlantic.

How I'd love to time-travel and get to spend one more day at the beach with Grandma, me and Ben bringing pails of water up to fill a moat we'd dug, going across to Mrs. Stahl's for lime rickies and hot potato knishes which we'd eat with fingers wrinkled and salty from hours in the ocean.

Now I live far from the ocean and far from Brooklyn, in a place that—nice as it is—will never be home in the same way. All my grandparents are gone and, in a way, Brooklyn’s gone too—the way it used to be. Back then, each of those summer days seemed endless and it seemed too as if life would always be filled with those essential elements we took for granted: Grandma’s voice; the gulls stealing our crumbs; the wind whipping our faces as we “made fast” across the bridge.

Kids say the darndest things

2007-03-02T00:26:00.000-05:00

I used to think I'd be able to always remember the funny, sweet, and wise things Noah says...but I've come to realize that these gems are lost if I don't write them down. So I've tried to make note of them in journals through the years.

Here, for posterity, are a few recent quips from Noah:

On his future profession: "Mom, I think I want to be a physicist" PAUSE "What's a physicist again?"

On babies: "It would be great if Sophie came with a remote control for volume control and muting."

On gay and straight:

Me: "Some men choose to marry other men and some marry women. Both choices are just fine. Who do you think you might want to marry, a man or a woman?"

Noah: "Can you marry a poodle?"

On the structure of U.S. government: "There are three branches: the legislative branch; the Judaism branch; and the execution branch."

On the amount of love he feels for me: "A googleplex to the power of infinity, minus one."

The "minus one" was apparently added so I wouldn't get a swell head!

And here's the beginning of a Quotable Sophie collection:

Yesterday, on her three month birthday, Nanny Jess sang "Old MacDonald" to her and--when Jess got up to the cow's part ("With a...") Sophie piped up and said "Moo" ! Jess was so surprised and yelled downstairs to us "Sophie just said Moo!" and then, a minute later, Jess yelled excitedly "She did it again!" It seems Sophie contributed another "Moo" to the song. That's right folks, at exactly three months of age, our daughter has started having her say! When I spoke to my mother today, she asked "How's little Moo-Moo doing?" And so a nickname is born!

Happy Three Month Birthday!

2007-02-28T20:21:00.000-05:00

Darling girl,
Three months ago today you were born.

How did we ever live without you?

Love,
Mommies

Pacify me

2007-02-27T23:37:00.000-05:00

To pacify or not to pacify, that was the question...but the answer quickly became clear:

Sophie would nurse recreationally around the clock if we let her. Hence, the pacifier. Or the bobby as we call it. (40 years ago my pediatrician uncle recommended that my parents give me a pacifier...Bobby's advice...hence, "the bobby" was born." )

Noah never had a bobby, never needed one. He nursed like an efficient machine...latched on, got the job done, filled his tummy and then was done. Sophie is a snuggler and likes to dilly-dally on the job, stops frequently to chat and chuckle, dozes off in a blissful daze but jolts awake with a shriek if taken off the boob.

So we sneak the bobby into her mouth as a stand-in, a silicone substitute to give my "girls" a little down time, ha!

If I had nothing else to do, I'd just sit and nurse non-stop and stare at this face in wonder day and night. But life is busy so good old bobby helps me out from time to time!

pretty and pacified

And the Oscar goes to...

2007-02-27T00:16:00.000-05:00

I can't help but rant about the Academy Awards last night.

Movies rank high among my favorite things in life. I'm at my happiest in a theater. Favorite childhood memories include long afternoons at the local multiplex where we would buy a ticket to one movie and then sneak in and out of all the other movies for hours. My own cinema paradiso. My taste in films is quirky, opinionated, passionate...and my first thought about a really good movie is "I wish I'd written that!"

With all that said, this year's Oscars ceremony was pretty blah for me. There were a few enjoyable moments...The Pilobolus dancers were amazing, as was that bizarre sound effects choir. Much of the rest was a big ho-hum this year. I hate to say it, but Ellen's hosting was flat and uninspired. The films themselves were nothing great in my book. I'll say it here--2006 was not the cinema's finest year. So many films were of the testosterone-run-amok variety...It's not enough that their macho, death-loving, pissing-contest, insecure mentality has fucked up the nation and the planet...They also have to make film after film--millions upon millions of dollars worth of films--exploding bodies on the screen for our viewing pleasure. Men and guns, men in love with war and gore. No thanks.

Speaking of Gore (how 'bout that segue!) it was good to see him...and, even though I knew it was only a goof, I still got a bit excited when he teased us about announcing his candidacy. Sigh.

Of the non-machismo films nominated, none really rocked my world.

As much as I love Helen Mirren, The Queen was the biggest bore and disappointment. Oh, the drama! 10 a.m. Tuesday: The Queen furrows her brow. 6 p.m. Tuesday: The Queen is curt with the Prime Minister. 4 p.m. Friday: The Queen faintly smiles. Though she did a good job (she can't do otherwise, so talented) what an utter waste of Helen Mirren's talents.

And gag me with all the celebratory rhetoric, the tender homages, to the bloody Queen of England...Have I missed something? When did she turn into someone to give a rat's ass about? (Yeah, this is how I get past midnight hopped up on coffee, heh!)

On to Little Miss Sunshine: Charming, lovely, a few laughs...but a slight film, one that I don't need to see again too soon and didn't dwell on too long after the credits. Nostalgic for me because I actually grew up with a VW van we had to push to start and then jump on board...There must be a whole cadre of us out there!

Volver looks like typical fun, wild Almodovar stuff...Haven't seen it yet.

Dreamgirls--I really liked it but I can't say it was world-class acting. The singing was terrific and the sets were fun. I'm glad I saw it but didn't scream "Best Film of the Year" to me. By the way, never go to a musical with people who are not die-hard musical lovers. Though I did make it clear to my mom and aunt ahead of time (love you both! kisses, hugs!) that it was a musical, they kibbitzed under their breath throughout the movie. Example: Mom: "Can't they SAY a few of their lines?" Aunt: "Again with the singing?!" Me: "It's a MUSICAL. That means they SING."

Now that I'm done ranting, I'll tell you what the two moments of pure perfection at the Oscars were for me:

The first would be Melissa Etheridge's acceptance speech (so glad she won for that fab song...wasn't her performance strong last night?!), especially the beautiful phrase "I'd like to thank my lovely wife..." Forget about the "L" word...The "W" word is the issue. So many of us (myself included) say "wife" all the time in private and with friends, but chicken out and say "partner" or something equally vague and vanilla in most conversations. It was a golden, simple, powerful little moment at the Oscars, hearing her thank her wife. Thanks Melissa.

Last but not least: Penelope Cruz. That's all I'm going to say :-) G'night!

A Saturday Concert

2007-02-26T22:03:00.000-05:00

Noah is a violinist.

I don't just mean he takes violin lessons, although it started out that way. But somewhere along the way, something clicked and he transformed into a musician. He hums Bach in the bathtub and minuets in the minivan. He wakes up composing tunes in his head and rushes to write down the notes before they vanish. He rocks and sways when he plays and pulls his bow over the strings slowly on the final note, enjoying the sensation of standing amidst the vibrations. He is a musician. This past Saturday afternoon, he played a solo in a recital and did a beautiful job. Afterwards, we told him he could choose our evening/dinner activity, whatever his heart desired. His heart desired pizza and pinball at a local joint! Well, I said he was a musician but he's also a ten year old boy! Here are some photos from the outing.

Dressed up for big brother's concert (Thanks for the outfit, Auntie Liz and Uncle Ben!)

Waiting to play

The lady in her carriage, with her faux fur cuffs and her pinky in the air!

After he finished playing and is walking back to us. He was proud of himself and we were too.

Now it's time for....

pizza!

...and pinball!

Beds

2007-02-23T20:49:00.000-05:00

What's the first question most people ask new parents? Usually it's "Is the baby sleeping through the night yet?" or some version of that query.

In our case, the answer is a definite no. Sophie has teased us with a couple of 6 hour stretches a few times, getting our hopes up that this might be her new norm. No dice. Most nights she sleeps for 4 hours max. Typically those hours are 9:30 to 1:30. That's the core deep sleep time; after that, it's cat naps, some waking, some crying, some farting...and that's just my routine--you should see what the baby does all night...hardy har har.

Nanny Jess said recently--when I described our nightly schedule--"I can't even imagine coping with that" and it's true. Before you have a baby, there's just no way to imagine the depths of sleep deprivation. It can really feel like torture, plain and simple. But you adapt to it--I don't know how, but you do. If the military was smart (and that's a big IF) they'd study mothers of infants to see real strength under fire. Noah didn't sleep for more than an hour at a time for the entire first year. It was up and down all night long. I'd take the first shift and wake Anne at 3 or 4 or and she'd take over. And though he was a delightful baby and the light of our lives, the words "post-traumatic stress" pretty much sum up the memories of those first 365 nights.

But we were both ten years younger then. Flash forward to a couple years ago when I was working overtime trying to convince Anne (15 years my senior at 56) to have another child. I'd always sweeten the deal by saying "I'll take the whole night this time"..."Don't worry honey, you won't be involved at night at all...I'll sleep in the baby's room all night and you won't hear a thing."

Except for a few desperate, exhausted nights when we first brought the baby home, I've been true to my word. The whole family gets up at 6:30. Two clock radios, Anne's and mine, wake us up to NPR and Noah's CD alarm plays Suzuki Book Three. Loudly. Very Loudly. I sleep in Sophie's room all night, in the twin bed next to her co-sleeper crib. Anne sleeps by herself in our room, the lone queen in our queen bed. She wears a black eye mask to bed, as well as ear plugs. Orange, expandable foam hunting ear plugs from Wal-Mart to be exact. She hears nothing and sleeps like...well, like a baby.

So here's the drill, sometime between 3 and 4 a.m. (after I've been up and down since 1:30, changing diapers, sitting up to nurse, re-positioning her in the crib, etc.) I nurse Sophie lying down in bed and don't bother putting her back in the crib... and we doze and nurse, nurse and doze until 5:30. That's the hour I crack--I reach my absolute limit of caretaking and absolutely must have a break, must be alone, must not be sucked on, must have silence, must not be needed. That's the part about motherhood we often don't know until we experience it: the painful sensory overload, the longing in every cell for stillness and rest.

So I make my way across the hall with Sophie in my arms, open the door to my bedroom and open the door...There it is, the land I'm in exile from! The big familiar bed! The warm length of Anne against my back! All these things I ache for, all given up for the little creature wriggling in my arms. I wake Anne with a tug and she makes room for the baby to lie next to her. They're face to face, two snuggly bears in a den -- and the second I set the baby down, my arms ache for her, I can hardly stand to pull myself away from her, from Anne, the two of them. But I do. I need a hot bath or a little more sleep or some time to just sit in the rocker and stare into space before the day begins.

We leave this bed...

And go to this one...

Our grown-up girl

2007-02-23T18:13:00.000-05:00

Sophie noticed that her Auntie Jody left a comment on the last blog entry, so she thought it would be fun to model the elegant outfit Jody, Silver and Jolon gave her. Thanks again guys! It's such a soft, lovely dress--and, as you can see by her quilt and pillows, aquamarine is a favorite color of ours.

On another topic, as Jody mentioned, her wonderful son Jolon is half-brother to Sophie and Noah. We wish we all lived closer so we could see them more often, but--despite the distance--we feel a real connection with them and we look forward to nurturing our bond with them in the years ahead. Connecting with our childrens' half-sibs and their familes has been really fascinating and mostly very positive experience for us. There's so much to say on this topic that I'll save it for future posts...but I will raise one "food for thought" issue: We haven't yet come up with creative lingo to describe these new relationships. I dubbed Jody the kids' aunt for lack of a better term...but what do we call the mothers of our children's half-brothers and sisters? What do we moms call one another? Such interesting ties we have to each other. The only thing I can think of that's even remotely similar are polygamist Mormon co-wives who all have children to the same man...except in our case we've never met the guy!

Okay, enough on that for now...Back to the photo of Sophie...Seeing her in a more grown-up dress today (truly, I wish they had this in my size!) made me glimpse the bigger girl she's going to be. It's not hard to see into the future when we look at her. This photo captures something Anne and I have seen in her from the very start: Sophie looks at people with such a knowing expression, with a depth in her eyes and a sweet, sly little smile...It's really unusual for a not-yet-three month old baby, I'd say! She's very alert and...I don't know how to convey this exactly except to say there's something mature in her eyes and it's just pure magic for us when she gazes at us. It just thrills us to imagine the conversations we're going to have, the secrets and stories and experiences we can share with our daughter!

(Sophie's eyes, by the way, are still dark blue. Noah's were too until he was about a year old when they became more green like mine.)

A last thought: Anne and I both see my mother in Sophie so much, every day, all the time. Noah looks like her too but Sophie even more so. We think it's really cute to have a daughter who resembles her Grandma. I'll take some photos of them together next time my mom visits!

Snow day fun!

2007-02-21T08:46:00.000-05:00

On a recent morning, Anne and I (she on crutches, and me with ice packs on my bad back) were bemoaning the fact that we couldn't take our boy sledding on the most perfect sledding day of Winter 2007 thus far...sunny, cold but not too cold, no wind, blue sky.....when the ringing phone interrupted our pitiful conversation. It was the mother of one of Noah's classmates: "Would Noah like to come sledding with us this morning?" Yipppeeee!!!! Here he is, bundled to the hilt, waiting outside our house for their car to pull up. He came home about two hours later with rosy cheeks and tales of "the huge ramp the older kids made" that he and his friend went over, soaring (Eek...glad I wasn't there to see it! Low tolerance for extreme sports!) Anyway, Hilary was right...It does take a village to raise a child. Or at least a well-timed play-date here and there.

This photo--and all photos of my kids smiling--brings to mind another theme...What adjectives come to mind when we describe our childhoods? Most parents want their kids to have happy childhoods. I know mine did. And although I wouldn't change a thing, (my past certainly shaped who I am today) I would choose the adjective "fascinating" or "complex" or "stimulating" to describe my childhood as a whole. I mean, I definitely had happy times but it wasn't a simple childhood. Are simplicity and innocence integral to a happy childhood? I don't know. I think we tend to try to give our children what we lacked growing up. For instance, I had a very nomadic childhood so it pleases me no end that Noah and Sophie are having a more rooted experience. On the other hand, my upbringing has made me very good at adapting to changes and I'd like them to have that flexible quality too. More to say on this topic another time. For now, I'll just say that sometimes their smiles make me wonder how they'll someday characterize their childhoods. Though it may be a mythical creature--the happy, care-free childhood--that's still what I wish for them with all my heart.

2007-02-12T23:01:00.000-05:00

Self-portrait of tired-but-happy me and my beautiful girl...I'm looking at myself in the mirror and through the lens, thinking "Jumpin' Jehosophat, do I look worn out...look at those exhausted eyes and that dry, lanky hair. But oh, this glorious, radiant little bundle of joy sure is worth every bit of it."

She's looking up and wondering what in the world Crazy Mama is doing now.

Advice to self: Go to sleep now, tired Mama, it's 11:19 and you're up fooling around with photos while your babe is sleeping!

Bath by the window

2007-02-12T22:50:00.000-05:00

Sophie's nanny, Jess, giving her a bath.

Sophie turns to give Mommy a smile.

What a happy girl!

Content and relaxed in her tub!

Diagnosis: Acute Bustification

2007-02-11T23:19:00.001-05:00

busted
Originally uploaded by

Just when we were patting ourselves on the back about how smoothly things were going, Anne tripped over a table ("It stuck its leg out as I walked by") in her mother's room on Saturday morning while helping her mother make the bed. (My 90 year old mother-in-law lives with us.) At first, I was hoping it was just a badly jammed toe, but when Anne started getting nauseous and was writhing in pain on our bathroom floor, we both realized it was probably a bad break, literally. Off to the ER we went, with Sophie in her car seat...Noah stayed home with Nana. Looking at her x-ray, the jovial physician's assistant pronounced it "totally bustificated"...or in more clinical terms, a fracture of the fourth proximal phalange. Anne was fitted with a lovely "post-op boot" --size medium--and given a pair of crutches. However, they hurt her to use so the poor thing has been scooting up and down the stairs on her butt and has been crawling around the house on her hands and knees, (totally confusing the dog, I might add!) I'm in overdrive trying to take care of errands, cleaning, baby care, etc. with Anne sidelined. Yes, it's been quite a weekend folks! But we're comforting ourselves with that wonderful phrase: It could have been worse. It's only a broken toe--albeit one that won't heal for 6-8 weeks. I'm able-bodied, the nanny will be here to help out, and we'll muddle through it. Anne's decided she'd prefer a wheelchair to this crutches/crawling routine, so we'll look into renting one tomorrow.
I love this woman with all my heart but WHAT A KLUTZ!!! Hard to believe she was a professional dancer for years! They know her by name in the ER by now---broken wrist (rollerblading), concussion (ice skating), then there was the tetanus shot--can't remember what that was for; also the lacerated toe; there's more, we'll have to list 'em all sometime just for kicks. As we say about our kids, it's a good thing she's so cute :-)

Happy Blogiversary to Me!

2007-02-08T22:29:00.001-05:00

Evening Scene
Originally uploaded by

Today is my one year blogiversary! To celebrate, I'm posting a candid shot from this evening, a typical household scene these days...Noah doing homework (on the messy dining table) and Anne doing the bounce-and-rock walk up and down with a sleepy baby Sophie. Last February 8th, things were quite different. My post title was something like "The Tank is in the House!" and the entry was full of hope for the February baby-making cycle. Well, February didn't work out...but March sure did in a big way! We're so grateful that Sophie is here with us. It's hard to describe how complete she makes our family and our hearts. Isn't it impossible to imagine that our children were ever not with us once they've arrived?! And yet, one short year ago tonight, I was just wishing on a star...

A discerning viewer

2007-02-07T22:58:00.001-05:00

Discerning Viewer
Originally uploaded by

Check out that concentration...not to mention those CHEEKS!

It's show time!

2007-02-07T22:57:00.001-05:00

It's show time!
Originally uploaded by

How's this for a momentous milestone? This afternoon marked Sophie's first time watching television. Oh, sure, before today she's occasionally peeked at The Colbert Report while nursing or solved a Jeopardy question or two. But today we received the Babysongs dvds we'd ordered for her...They were Noah's favorites years ago and it was really nostalgic for me and Anne to have another child watching Babysongs. I was singing along with tears in my eyes...but I digress. Sophie's reaction was something amazing to see: She stared so intently at all the images, really studying everything she saw (who does that remind us of?!) When babies on the screen were laughing (as in this photo) she smiled back at them. She waved her hands, she cooed, she frowned, she arched a brow...It was a total viewing experience. For Mommy too. Hap Palmer still rocks the house, ten years later!

Jolly in her jaunty hat

2007-01-31T23:46:00.000-05:00

Jaunty Hat
Originally uploaded by

Aunt Susie made this sweet cap for Sophie. It's a bit big on her and, after a couple minutes on, it slid down to one side. We think it lends quite a jaunty Parisian air to our mademoiselle, n'est-ce pas? Sophie seems to like it....Look at that gummy grin, those cheeks, those twinkly eyes...She's such a delicious girl, I can barely believe it...(Happy mommy sigh)

Thank you for the cap Aunt Susie!

Who's that pretty girl in the mirror there?

2007-01-31T23:32:00.000-05:00

Swing
Originally uploaded by

Sophie has recently discovered the fun of checking herself out in the mirror above her swing. The other day, she was flirting with herself quite charmingly, as you can see in this photo!

A few words about the swing (a Fisher Price cradle swing, for those who are interested): Sophie seemed to hate it for the first 7 or 8 weeks. She'd fuss as soon as we put her into it. I was just about to put the swing in storage in the basement when--at the two month mark--our girl suddenly responded with interest, excitement and, dare I say, glee at sitting in her swing. It's fascinating to notice how--with her newfound maturity at two months--she's suddenly taken with the revolving birds and bumblebees above the swing, enjoys the motion, listens to the music and, most importantly, LOVES her own darling reflection. We also adjusted the seat so that it tilts forward more (rather than being in a reclined cradle mode) and we changed the swinging direction from side to side to forward and backward.

THANK YOU, AUNT PAULINE AND UNCLE SCOTT, FOR MY SPECIAL HANG-OUT! I HAVE FUN IN IT EVERY DAY!

Noah Turns 10!

2007-01-25T23:06:00.000-05:00

Noah Turns 10!
Originally uploaded by

A final post for this evening: With all this attention on Sophie, let me add that my first baby turned TEN recently. He had a fun pool party with his classmates the day before his birthday (with dog themed cake and decorations). On his actual birthday, we granted his wish to go to a local store where kids stuff their own stuffed animal and pick out an outfit and accessories for their new buddy. Here's the proud owner of "Bubbles" the dog! He had a blast doing this and we enjoyed watching his fun. Bubbles is wearing a skateboarding outfit complete with headphones and red rollerblades--and he also has a pair of blue pj's to change into at night. Not an inexpensive outing but you only turn ten once (ohmygod, my boy is in the double digits!) so we splurged. We're just so proud of our amazing son--and very glad he's not yet too cool at ten years old to be thrilled by a new stuffed toy.

Sleeping Beauty

2007-01-25T22:57:00.000-05:00

Sleeping Beauty
Originally uploaded by

I couldn't resist posting this shot of Sophie catching a few winks in her high chair. Those are very kissable cheeks indeed! It's hard to walk past her when she's sleeping and not steal a few smooches. Sending out a big thank you to Uncle Ben and Aunt Liz for the soft pink blankie!

Sitting Pretty

2007-01-25T22:54:00.000-05:00

Sitting Pretty
Originally uploaded by

Some friends have asked for my thoughts on which baby items have turned out to be must-haves and which are wastes of money. Happy to oblige! So far, we're loving the Prima Pappa high chair by Peg Perego (Sophie gives a big hug of thanks to godparents Emy and Mitch!) Even though we're months away from solid food, you can see from this photo that our little princess Sophie just loves her comfy throne in its reclined infant position. It adjusts to many different heights and seat angles, is neutral and cool looking (Italian styling :-) , has a big tray and wipes clean easily.

The play mat pictured in the posts below is another must-have (it's the deluxe one from Tiny Love, I believe).

Some other things (big ticket items) that get five stars:

Graco Metrolite stroller, unbelievably easy to collapse, steers well, light weight but sturdy. Fantastic.

Graco Pack 'n Play in the Windsor design I think it's called. Sophie's nap spot and changing table downstairs. Besides the car seat/stroller combo, this is our most essential baby gear.

Sophie is just starting to enjoy her swing...I'll save that topic for another photo/blog post.

Oh! Let me not forget to say the Arm's Reach Co-Sleeper crib has worked out beautifully for us--love having her right next to me but in her own protected (from me crushing her or blankets smothering her) space.

Other smaller-ticket baby gear items we love:

The sleep-positioner thingy. Great. She stays on her back and I can sleep w/out constantly checking whether she's still on her back.

The ridiculously named but absolutely priceless necessity, the "My Brest Friend" nursing pillow. A big foam platform that straps around your waist and saves you from all kinds of muscle strains and positioning woes when breastfeeding. Used all day long around here.

Kimono style nightgowns and big comfy sleep-sacks to put over them. Who wants to deal with snaps for 3 a.m. diaper changes?

Pacifiers--yes, we've crossed that line and she gets one popped in her mouth in the car when we're almost home and nursing is a few minutes away.

Random thoughts popping into my head:

Huggies instead of Pampers...except for the wipes...Pampers Sensitive Skin wipes, thinner and softer and easier to use.

Triple Paste diaper rash cream. Better than Desitin. Amazing stuff.

Baby socks are RIDICULOUS so get lots of outfits with feet and use those as much as possible.

Buy more blankets than you ever thought you needed (this could just be the opinion of a mama to two winter babies.)

I know I have other opinions--lots of 'em--but can't think of any more right now (Oy! TIred! So so tired!) so this will have to be an ongoing topic.

Kisses

2007-01-25T22:27:00.000-05:00

Kisses
Originally uploaded by

Noah kisses Sophie all the time. Here's a sweet kiss the camera captured. We are touched beyond words by their bond. Here, in this picture, is something I dreamed about for years when I thought about having a second child. Someone for Noah to grow up with, someone for him to love who will adore him in return. Loyalty. Togetherness. Family. And the reality is even better. Noah says something every night that expresses his tenderness and pure awe at her existence, such as "I love Sophie" or "She's really here." A couple of days ago, he was cuddling in bed with me and the baby--and after he held and studied her little hand, he looked at me and said "Mama, Sophie is ALIVE." His wonder and excitement when he said that is exactly how I still feel looking at our sweet girl. She's alive and she belongs with us!

Playmates

2007-01-25T22:14:00.000-05:00

Playmates
Originally uploaded by

Who says siblings a decade apart can't be close friends and playmates?! Noah decided to get right down on the mat with his sister and share her view of the world. He likes her toys almost as much as she does! And she LOVES him. What do you think her expression is saying here? Something along the lines of "This big guy is so awesome. And there's something so lovably familiar about him."

When Noah's around, Sophie watches his every move and we even think we've noticed the beginnings of her imitating him. She'll move her mouth when he's talking to her and makes sounds back at him. She's even started moving her fingers when he plays violin! She truly only has eyes for her big brother when he's in the room.

Almost two months old!

2007-01-25T22:06:00.000-05:00

Tummy Time
Originally uploaded by Melissa B. Moss.

Here's our darling girl in one of her favorite places, her activity mat. Parents are now advised to give their babies plenty of "tummy time" and Sophie gets a work-out on her mat, lifting her neck to look in the mirror and reaching up (when on her back) to grab at the dangling animal toys.

Sophie says: Thanks Aunt Pauline and Uncle Scott for the gift certificate my moms used to buy me this cool mat. I play on it every day!

Alone time

2007-01-11T00:15:00.000-05:00

Although many people think of me as a very social person--meaning I love to talk, love to throw parties, love having a houseful of friends and family--those who know me best know that I also really crave time alone. Lots of it. Being a writer, I'm quite happy to be alone for hours a day, thinking, typing, reading...Bliss! Needless to say, one of my biggest challenges in parenting an infant is the lack of alone time. I find I need to steal time away from everyone somehow...Which is I'm up past midnight, ignoring the edict to "sleep when baby sleeps," just to get some time to putter around the house, surf online, write, and think. I hear Sophie stirring so I know this break will be brief...and I'll probably regret the lost sleep come morning...but it just felt necessary tonight to have some non-mommying time. Non-relating time. Non-talking time. Do I need to add how much I'm adoring the mommying? How in love I am with my daughter? (That word still sends a thrill through me...daughter!) I just went into Noah's room and pulled the covers around him. My love for these two children is the very core of my being. What am I writing and thinking about when I take "time off" for myself? Noah and Sophie. Sophie and Noah. These beautiful, amazing beings entrusted to me. May I have all the strength, energy, patience, and balance needed to do this sacred job right. To do right by them means doing right by myself---which for me will always mean stealing time away when I can to visit with myself!

Kids & Cousins

2007-01-07T12:14:00.000-05:00

Kids & Cousins
Originally uploaded by

Noah was very proud to show his sister off to his cousins! I love this photo of the kids. Aren't they beautiful?! Smart and sweet too. It was a joy to see them all together. And a joy to have a new camera to capture these moments--thanks honey!

Belated Happy New Year!

2007-01-07T12:08:00.000-05:00

Family Group
Originally uploaded by Melissa B. Moss.

It seems I'm doing everything on my "to do" list a week later than planned these days. Such is life with baby! So please accept belated good wishes for the new year. Here's hoping for health, happiness and peace in your family circle and in the world. We kicked off 2007 with a nice visit from my brother and his family, along with my parents (pictured in the middle) and my aunt and uncle, not pictured here. We don't see one another too often which made this visit extra special. Noah really enjoyed seeing his cousins and I think everyone enjoyed meeting Sophie!

Tenderness

2007-01-03T09:05:00.000-05:00

Tenderness
Originally uploaded by

Noah is so tender and loving with his little sister and asks frequently to hold her. We hope that the close bond they're creating in these early days will last a lifetime.

(To see more photos of Noah and Sophie together, click on this shot and you'll be taken to our Flickr account where you can see all our posted photos.)

My brother is so COOL!

2007-01-03T08:58:00.000-05:00

My brother is so COOL!
Originally uploaded by Melissa B. Moss.

Sophie loves looking at Noah and we love seeing them together. We suspect she'll be looking for his attention for a long time to come!

One month old!

2006-12-30T16:59:00.000-05:00

IMG_0458
Originally uploaded by

Here's our girl at one month old! Getting bigger all the time, thanks to near-constant nursing...wow, I'd forgotten how demanding and also how wonderful the nursing bond is. I feel like she and I are stil two beings in one, as we were when I was pregnant. In this photo, she's relaxing on top of her snuggly warm car seat cover (thanks again Louise!) which has been keeping her toasty during our frequent outings. We can barely remember life without our Sophie! Happy one month birthday, darling girl.

Almost three weeks old!

2006-12-18T11:23:00.000-05:00

Getting clean
Originally uploaded by

Here's a quick report from two weeks and six days...Hard to believe that Sophie is almost three weeks old! We're learning so much about her every day--every hour!--and enjoying every second of her infancy so much. With a second child, you really know from experience how fast it all flies by and how important it is to savor the moments.

Sophie is a completely delightful little person. She's very good-natured and not in the least bit colicky or fussy, thank goodness! She'll cry if she's wet or hungry but she is quickly soothed when she's taken care of. She's a very bright-eyed and observant baby and already visually follows objects and people. She has started to suck on her fists occasionally and even on her thumb a couple times.

Nursing is going well and she is breastfeeding for every "meal" except for a couple ounces of formula that Anne gives her between 10:30 p.m. and 2:30 a.m.

Although some people say babies this young don't have "real" smiles yet (in other words, only gas-pain induced smile/grimaces) we beg to differ--Sophie gives us some beautiful (gas-free) smiles every day and we just cherish them.

So far, she's had a number of "firsts" such as: 1st restaurant outing (Golden Wok for Chinese food); 1st concert (Suzuki string recital); 1st Sunday brunch 'n shop at Wegmans (picture Sophie in my arms nursing under a blanket while Anne and I sit in the cafe eating muffins and reading the Sunday Times); 1st promenade in the stroller (I'm feeling guilty to admit we're enjoying the global-warming induced mild winter days); and 1st Hanukkah party. She's been one busy baby! But most of the time we're just snuggling up together on the couch at home, warm and cozy, nursing and gazing at one another...and the days just run together in a lovely blur.

As for me, I'm tired but not overwhelmingly, mind-numbingly so and I don't feel like I have any "baby blues" ---so I'd say my post-partum experience has been pretty good so far. I'll feel even better when I drop some more pregnancy weight and can exercise again. I see the nurse tomorrow to have my incision checked and I'm going to ask her about when I can start going to the gym. Hoping to be back in my regular, non-maternity, non-stretchy waistband clothes by spring!

Yesterday Noah said the sweetest thing to me. We were getting out of the car and arranging Sophie in her stroller when Noah turned to me and said "Mama, you worked so hard to have her" -- I was SO touched that he said this and so proud of my soulful and caring boy. He really was able to see me as a person when he said that and honor & acknowledge what I've gone through. He was proud of ME, isn't that wonderful?!

I'd better jump in the shower while Sophie is still napping. To see more photos from the set I just uploaded ("Bath Time") just click on the above shot.

Sophie with pixie hat

2006-12-09T21:56:00.000-05:00

Sophie with pixie hat
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Here's our sweet Sophie at one week old...We love this girl SO much!

Brotherly love

2006-12-09T21:54:00.000-05:00

Wonderful big brother
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Another photo of our darling son and daughter together!

Our two sweethearts

2006-12-09T21:52:00.000-05:00

Our two sweethearts
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Words can't express the joy of seeing our two children together. Noah is doing SO well as a new big brother--as we knew he would. He's got such a caring heart and tender spirit...and Sophie's arrival is already having a big effect on him. He checks on her often when she's napping in her crib and loves staring at her tiny hands and feet in total wonder. We hope they're friends their whole lives. We know she'll adore her fabulous big brother!